March 5, 2025

Biblical Perspectives on Social Media and Technology

Biblical Perspectives on Social Media and Technology

Episode 113


Michael and Zach reinvite Jonathan White to discuss how we should think about social media and technology in our lives and our children's lives.


Original Lesson Part 1: https://www.sermonaudio.com/sermons/22325225017395

Original Lesson Part 2: https://www.sermonaudio.com/sermons/3325140534484

Resources: https://www.dropbox.com/scl/fi/pld3cji7wnnj06srise3x/resouce-page.jpg?rlkey=eh0sm5s4qopo7dqva3z1f7j6w&st=77ffh3nn&dl=0Find our videocast here: https://youtu.be/AZFxYvpWvnI


Music from #Uppbeat (free for Creators!):

⁠https://uppbeat.io/t/reakt-music/deep-stone⁠

License code: 2QZOZ2YHZ5UTE7C8


Find more Take 2 Theology content at https://take2pod.wordpress.com/

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Zach.
Michael.

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How's it going for the podcast
for today?

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I mean, we're recording.
Things are different today.

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Things things are different.
If if you're on the pod, you

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don't know what that is yet, but
if you're on YouTube, you

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probably already have a good
idea that our green screen's

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gone green.
Screen's gone that, and that's

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not the only thing.
That's probably a good idea for

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people to subscribe to us on
YouTube so they can get this

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exclusive content.
They'll know what's going on.

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And I'm going to do these in in
order of importance.

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So probably the second biggest
thing is we have a guest with us

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here, Jonathan White.
Welcome back to the podcast.

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He just waved if you are
watching on YouTube.

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If you didn't, you missed it.
So we can just kind of narrate

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the action as it goes.
That's that's good.

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And then probably third, most
important is that we don't more,

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even more important to have
Jonathan, we don't have Lord of

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the Rings in our background.
Which is, which is, to be fair,

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all I've ever wanted.
That's why.

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That's why I came on the podcast
in the 1st place as I wanted to

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be in Hobbiton or one of the
other locations.

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Yeah, and, and every time I show
up there, they take the green

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screen away.
It is crazy if we.

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Could get the green screen maybe
like 1 foot wider.

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We could probably do it with
three people, but unless we, we,

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I guess we could just sit
really, really close to each

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other.
That's true.

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That'd.
Be The Hobbit house gets a

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little snug with three guys in
there, huh?

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Honestly, as much as Jonathan
wishes he was there, I'm so glad

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I'm not.
So I don't know, It's like it's

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one man stretch.
It's another man stretch or

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something like that.
And then lastly, I'm wearing a

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blue shirt.
Jill makes fun.

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Never heard of seen this before.
I know Jill makes fun because

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I'm I want to buy a shirt.
She's like you.

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How many blue shirts do you
have?

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Like I have a lot of blue shirts
because blue is my normal color.

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But without the green screen
here we can.

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We're free to wear whatever
color we want.

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To I would like to point out
that I've been free to wear

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whatever color I want since the
first time I was on this

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podcast.
It's pretty amazing, but it does

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get texted about Jonathan and
his wisdom was like is it OK?

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What color am I allowed to wear
because he knows that you were

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the wrong color.
Boom all.

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Right.
So Jonathan, we just got done

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teaching a series at CBC and the
1st 246 lessons in that series,

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well it went parallel with your
Old Testament wisdom series.

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So send number of lessons were
about marriage and then we

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tacked on this end piece that we
thought was good for really

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everyone pertinent to marriage
and parenting, but talking about

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social media usage.
And so we wanted to ask, I mean,

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I guess if you're on YouTube,
you're kind of on some type of

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social media platform if you're
watching, but we wanted to have

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you here kind of give us an
overview of that.

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So anything to say before we
take it to the next level?

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Once again, we should have our
guests say this, and before we

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get into it, we should.
We did this last time, But what?

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Give us your credentials.
Assistant principal, Middle

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school at Northwood Academy.
He is a Coulson Fellow and he is

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a master teacher.
Do I know it?

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Then you think.
Those do belong to me.

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Those titles are mine.
And.

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Any other type Mr. Do you have
his masters in in some sort of

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writing?
In literature, yeah.

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Literature.
But that still makes me just a

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Mr. not a doctor or anything
like that.

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Yeah.
It's great.

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Well, J Carl.
White.

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That is my signature.
Talking about social media,

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that's something I only know you
by If they only see on Facebook,

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well, go ahead and just stare
into the soul of the camera and

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tell it that we're going to take
it to the next level.

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Let's take it to the next level.
From the hearts of the Low

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Country in South Carolina.
It's the Take Two podcast where

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we take theology to the next
level.

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So we are here with Jonathan, as
we said.

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And I just want to say off the
bat, really enjoy the class.

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I felt like I consider things
some things in a different light

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and that even led to action.
Maybe we'll talk about that,

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some of that action when we get
to it, where, where it fits into

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it.
Yeah, I will say this.

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It's we mentioned on another
podcast, we'll say it really

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briefly and maybe it's a teaser
for a future podcast.

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I don't know when the other
one's going to drop.

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But I, you know, for a short
time I have got rid of my

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Facebook app and it actually
calls me to be a worse employee

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at work.
Came back to bite me.

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I did not know what's going on
in my employee's life and I came

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off very in, you know, uncaring.
But I think that's a really one

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off.
It has to do with fires in

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Myrtle Beach, something that
probably won't happen a lot, but

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you know, yeah, yeah.
Anyway.

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So you talked about media usage
in general, maybe phone usage in

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particular, and you've given
this brief a number of times or

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talked to middle school kids and
parents.

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So is there something like just
give us a broad picture of maybe

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the what you've seen since you
started teaching, I don't know,

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10-12 years ago, 14 years ago,
1515 years ago?

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You were all around.
And.

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How does that make you feel?
Me that I.

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Have been.
You've been teaching for. 15 in

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the real world.
Wow.

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That is.
Crazy, at least.

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Yeah.
So the little known fact is that

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Jonathan was, I think you were
in 9th grade right when we came

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to CBC.
That sounds about right. 2002

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was your 9th grade year maybe
yes yeah yeah yeah so and and

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Jill and I, you were in our
youth group and then we had a

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relationship post youth group,
you know, or discipled and

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worked through the book of
Romans and maybe Galatians and

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so good, good time so yeah, I
guess that makes me old that's.

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What I was trying to get at, but
just not really get right at it.

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I just wanted to put it out
there.

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Yeah.
Yeah.

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Well, yeah.
So we, you know, so I started

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teaching in 2010 and that was
all high school.

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And it, it was one of those
situations where as, as I've

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been in the classroom over, you
know, that following decade

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plus, there's, there are
definitely changes that have

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happened.
And I think, I think if you were

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to talk to people, not even just
people in education, but if you

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were to talk to talk to people
that deal with adolescents in,

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in any capacity throughout their
days.

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There's just a lot of anecdotal
evidence that like things have

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changed.
Like there have been some

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differences in the way that
adolescents interact with other

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people, the way that they are
able to pay attention or not pay

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attention for longer period of
time.

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Do some of that, you know,
challenging mental investment

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when it's necessary and and all
of that kind of anecdotal

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evidence has really actually
gotten grounded in the last few

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years by a lot of actual hard
data.

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So social scientists have just
started to look at something

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that has shifted and, and really
the years in question are like

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2010 to 2015.
That's kind of the the time span

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where social scientists started
noticing a major upswing in what

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they call major depressive
episodes in adolescents and

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teenagers and a host of other
mental health related issues

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like a rise in anxiety and
medication for anxiety.

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You know, the prescriptions
being handed out for that in

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adolescence, as well as, you
know, emergency room reports and

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clinical reports of adolescents
involved in self harm.

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And so with with the just kind
of almost meteoric rise in those

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five or six years, it prompted a
lot of looking, a lot of

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testing, a lot of research and,
and data gathering.

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And one of the, I think maybe
one of the best resources out

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there right now about it.
I mean, it's gotten a lot of

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play time in media and on, you
know, bestseller book list.

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But The Anxious Generation by
Jonathan Haidt is sort of a

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compendium of the research
surrounding adolescence and

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mental health in this era, like
for mostly for Gen.

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Z.
And you were saying Jonathan

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Haidt is a pillar in the
Christian?

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I think he's a Dallas, the
electrics mirror graph, is that

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right?
Is that just a cut at Dallas?

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No, Jonathan Haidt is is open
about his atheism.

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He mentions it in the book.
And that was a caveat that I

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gave as we were talking through
his book.

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And really, I mean, we spent a
lot of time with his book.

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There were other things that
came up in that class that I

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think were important, but we did
spend a lot of time working

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through kind of the layout of
his book and what led up to it

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and the things that he saw in
the data.

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But the caveat was, you know, he
is an atheist.

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His his perspective is, you
know, evolutionary psychology.

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And so everything that we see,
whether in society or in the

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human psyche, he, his worldview
insists that it is just the

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result of biological evolution.
And that that kind of makes you

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wonder, OK, well, can I really,
can I read this book and get

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something out of it?
And it can be a that's a good

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concern, I think to have for
Christians reading discernment.

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But interestingly, the that
those kind of, you know, add his

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adherence to that worldview,
which we might call materialism,

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is not something that interrupts
his gathering and reporting of

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data.
And it's also interesting that

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in his book, he actually kind of
open handedly, you know, looks

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at data and says communities of
faith that are that are tight

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knit communities of faith that
have committed believers and,

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and you know, subtext.
You can read committed

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Christians like when there when
there's a family that is

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committed to church attendance,
Bible reading, Bible

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memorization, when they have
some of these certain factors in

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play.
Jonathan Hayes quick to say

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these sorts of, you know, groups
tend to see a much lower rate of

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some of they they kind of buck
the trend of what we see in the

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broader culture.
And that's not always true in

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the in the Christian community,
except when you adjust for

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making sure that when you're
looking at data, you're looking

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at actual committed born again
believers, right?

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So the there's, you know,
there's a statistic that says,

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you know, 50% of marriages and a
divorce for both believers and

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non believers.
Well, if you, if you actually

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look at those data sets and say,
what does it take to be called

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a, a believer, a Christian in
that data set, It's a pretty

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broad spectrum.
If you narrow it down to what is

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the divorce rate among committed
Christians that would call

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themselves born again, that have
a commitment to marriage as a

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covenant and attend church
regularly.

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Man, all of a sudden the the
divorce rate drops dramatically.

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And so again, it's it's
interesting coming from an

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evolutionary biology, biology,
biological perspective, even in

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psychology, Jonathan Haidt is
willing to go, yeah, like faith

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communities are doing something
right when they're when they're

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all in on their faith.
So it's an.

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It's just an interesting detail.
I would just say that I'm right

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there with you because I've had
conversations with atheists

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where the subject wasn't origin
of life and I was able to say,

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hey, you believe that we evolved
over a million years to this

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point.
I believe we were designed to

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this point.
Either way, we both believe that

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our bodies are adapted for this
thing, either by design or the

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revolution.
So we can agree to disagree on

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that right now because we're
talking about this thing.

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And so, you know, and I guess in
this particular subject we're

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talking about today, we have not
been necessarily designed or

219
00:12:34,120 --> 00:12:37,840
adapted to a lot of usage of
this screen.

220
00:12:37,840 --> 00:12:40,880
And so that's really going to
throw off our biology.

221
00:12:40,880 --> 00:12:44,200
So I think it's, you know, there
might be some minor differences

222
00:12:44,200 --> 00:12:48,320
of how we what we may say with
the solution is or some of the.

223
00:12:48,360 --> 00:12:51,800
But I think overall, like you
said, the data gathering and the

224
00:12:51,800 --> 00:12:54,960
idea that this is really
different than what we've done.

225
00:12:55,080 --> 00:12:58,040
Even if you even if you're a
very young earther and you think

226
00:12:58,040 --> 00:13:02,480
6000 years, like, OK, this is 10
years at the end of, you know,

227
00:13:02,480 --> 00:13:05,080
6000 years.
So this is a huge change for how

228
00:13:05,080 --> 00:13:07,040
humans have interacted with
their environments.

229
00:13:07,040 --> 00:13:07,680
Right.
Yeah.

230
00:13:07,680 --> 00:13:11,360
So the recognition of the
problem, that part is kind of

231
00:13:11,360 --> 00:13:12,920
unavoidable.
The data is unavoidable, you

232
00:13:12,920 --> 00:13:17,600
know, so, OK, so for, for the
last, you know, I guess the last

233
00:13:17,600 --> 00:13:25,320
decade or so from from 2010
through the 20 teens, again, it

234
00:13:25,320 --> 00:13:28,720
was a lot of anecdotal evidence.
It was a lot of teachers, you

235
00:13:28,720 --> 00:13:31,720
know, in teachers meetings
saying, man, I just can't, I

236
00:13:31,720 --> 00:13:33,120
can't get the kids to
concentrate.

237
00:13:33,120 --> 00:13:36,360
It was and, and so part of that
is developmentally appropriate.

238
00:13:36,360 --> 00:13:39,840
Like there, there are limits to,
to developmentally, there are

239
00:13:39,840 --> 00:13:43,200
limits to what children should
be expected and required to do

240
00:13:43,200 --> 00:13:46,640
in an academic setting.
But teachers across the board,

241
00:13:46,640 --> 00:13:48,800
we're having these conversations
and it's just, I just as

242
00:13:48,800 --> 00:13:51,280
something is, something's
different, something has changed

243
00:13:52,160 --> 00:13:54,840
and, and, and now the data is
here for it.

244
00:13:55,400 --> 00:14:00,040
So, so I I went through in our
Sunday school class the sort of

245
00:14:00,040 --> 00:14:03,760
the layout of Jonathan hates
book and we can just kind of

246
00:14:03,760 --> 00:14:05,840
briefly breeze through that
stuff.

247
00:14:05,960 --> 00:14:08,320
I'll take the first one and you
can take the other ones, but

248
00:14:08,320 --> 00:14:10,400
don't look at it.
Surge of suffering, is that

249
00:14:10,400 --> 00:14:12,200
right?
Yeah, because all the the data

250
00:14:12,200 --> 00:14:14,560
has started to pour in.
Longitudinal studies are now

251
00:14:14,560 --> 00:14:18,680
pouring in about, you know,
we've, we've got a decade and

252
00:14:18,680 --> 00:14:22,720
more of collected data on
adolescents and their screen

253
00:14:22,720 --> 00:14:26,160
time, their Internet usage or
social media app usage.

254
00:14:26,520 --> 00:14:30,680
And so that the that data is all
the graphs are like they just,

255
00:14:30,760 --> 00:14:33,480
they just kind of go up with
whether it's major depressive

256
00:14:33,480 --> 00:14:40,280
episodes, anxiety prescriptions,
whether it is the incidence of

257
00:14:40,280 --> 00:14:43,520
self harm or incidence of
bullying and cyber bullying in

258
00:14:43,520 --> 00:14:45,480
schools.
It's just that it's going up.

259
00:14:45,480 --> 00:14:49,000
So yeah, the surge of suffering
was the thing that required

260
00:14:49,360 --> 00:14:51,000
attention.
Like, let's look into these

261
00:14:51,000 --> 00:14:55,720
things. #2 I don't look at it
well, I was going to say I, I

262
00:14:55,760 --> 00:14:56,920
remember like surge of
suffering.

263
00:14:56,920 --> 00:14:58,160
Was the one I remember it so I
wanted.

264
00:14:58,240 --> 00:15:00,160
To just had to get that one
first.

265
00:15:00,560 --> 00:15:03,040
I remember helping out with the
youth group at our church.

266
00:15:03,040 --> 00:15:06,360
It probably was like 2015 or
something to your point,

267
00:15:06,360 --> 00:15:11,120
Jonathan, where it's like we did
a study on social media problem,

268
00:15:11,120 --> 00:15:14,320
like no hard data, but
everyone's kind of like, man, it

269
00:15:14,840 --> 00:15:17,840
definitely can't be good.
And I think most people probably

270
00:15:17,840 --> 00:15:20,760
know a lot of people with these
kind of disorders.

271
00:15:20,760 --> 00:15:23,720
It's not only something that's
going up, but not saying all

272
00:15:23,720 --> 00:15:26,680
this is bad, but very openly
talked about like the way the

273
00:15:26,680 --> 00:15:29,800
way you talk to someone is, do
you feel hurts or it's like a

274
00:15:29,800 --> 00:15:31,840
different even way to
communicate.

275
00:15:31,840 --> 00:15:36,160
Again, not all of it's sad, but
it's like, man, it's everywhere.

276
00:15:36,160 --> 00:15:39,320
Need to be very careful because
if you say something wrong and

277
00:15:39,320 --> 00:15:41,920
you're triggering and it's a
it's a complicated thing.

278
00:15:41,920 --> 00:15:43,320
I'm just going to go off my
memory.

279
00:15:43,320 --> 00:15:47,280
And I think it was something
about decline of play based

280
00:15:47,280 --> 00:15:48,200
childhood.
I don't know.

281
00:15:49,000 --> 00:15:50,400
Yeah.
So the next two sections of the

282
00:15:50,400 --> 00:15:54,320
book, Jonathan Haidt goes into
detailing the decline of what he

283
00:15:54,320 --> 00:15:57,440
calls a play based childhood and
the rise of what he calls a

284
00:15:57,440 --> 00:16:00,880
phone based childhood.
And in that that first section

285
00:16:00,880 --> 00:16:03,360
about play based childhoods, he
really starts to kind of talk

286
00:16:03,360 --> 00:16:05,560
about from a developmental
perspective, what do children

287
00:16:05,560 --> 00:16:09,600
need in order to thrive as
they're as they're growing

288
00:16:09,600 --> 00:16:13,000
through these really, really
important ages.

289
00:16:13,760 --> 00:16:18,560
Kids grow really fast and then
really slow for a little while.

290
00:16:19,440 --> 00:16:24,920
And, and in that, in that kind
of extended childhood that a lot

291
00:16:24,920 --> 00:16:29,440
of mammals don't have, there are
some really important milestones

292
00:16:29,440 --> 00:16:32,520
for, for humans.
And we would, we would say,

293
00:16:32,520 --> 00:16:34,720
well, this is again, this is by
design.

294
00:16:34,720 --> 00:16:38,560
This is not something that has
been just developed over

295
00:16:38,560 --> 00:16:41,440
millions of years.
But although millions of years

296
00:16:41,440 --> 00:16:44,280
could have been at play at some
points, depending on your

297
00:16:44,280 --> 00:16:48,920
creationist theorizing, whenever
we talk about a play based

298
00:16:48,920 --> 00:16:52,560
childhood, it's it's giving
opportunities for kids to

299
00:16:52,560 --> 00:16:55,360
develop in ways that are
important for them, where

300
00:16:55,360 --> 00:16:59,800
they're developing resilience,
the ability to be independent,

301
00:16:59,800 --> 00:17:04,240
to make choices, to assess, you
know, risk and reward.

302
00:17:04,240 --> 00:17:08,680
And so play based childhood is
really, if you're, I mean, if

303
00:17:08,680 --> 00:17:14,720
you're older than maybe 30 or
32, it's probably, it's probably

304
00:17:14,720 --> 00:17:17,319
kind of describes your childhood
like where you were, you kind of

305
00:17:17,319 --> 00:17:20,680
had the freedom after school,
you just kind of go out and

306
00:17:20,680 --> 00:17:23,040
you're, you're just out, you're
out with your friends, you're

307
00:17:23,040 --> 00:17:26,040
riding bikes around the
neighborhood or depending, you

308
00:17:26,040 --> 00:17:28,520
know, depending on where you
live, you're out doing chores.

309
00:17:28,520 --> 00:17:31,680
If you live in a rural, a rural
area, maybe it's dirt bikes and

310
00:17:31,680 --> 00:17:34,600
four Wheelers, maybe it's chores
out in the, in taking care of

311
00:17:34,600 --> 00:17:36,400
animals or doing something with
crops.

312
00:17:36,400 --> 00:17:40,560
But there was just a sort of
lack of adult supervision.

313
00:17:41,080 --> 00:17:43,600
And again, we can talk about
that in both positive and

314
00:17:43,600 --> 00:17:48,080
negative ways, but I just know
that there's there's a lot of

315
00:17:48,080 --> 00:17:51,440
things that happen in that, that
kind of play based childhood

316
00:17:51,440 --> 00:17:56,000
where there's a little bit more
of that unstructured freedom for

317
00:17:56,000 --> 00:18:00,000
kids to develop significant
aspects of both their

318
00:18:00,000 --> 00:18:04,120
personality and their character.
And Jonathan Haidt says, well,

319
00:18:04,120 --> 00:18:07,000
that's just really diminished as
we've gotten into this

320
00:18:07,520 --> 00:18:14,360
information culture, this
Internet saturated world, that's

321
00:18:14,360 --> 00:18:17,640
that kind of childhood has
really gone away because there's

322
00:18:17,640 --> 00:18:20,200
always a stimulus there.
And it's and it's easier and

323
00:18:20,200 --> 00:18:24,040
parents feel that it is safer,
you know, with the proliferation

324
00:18:24,040 --> 00:18:30,760
of a 24 hour news cycle and the
ability for, well, what makes

325
00:18:30,760 --> 00:18:33,480
people watch the news?
What makes people click on

326
00:18:33,480 --> 00:18:35,600
stories?
It's when they're horrifying

327
00:18:35,600 --> 00:18:38,280
things.
And so those stories tend to,

328
00:18:38,360 --> 00:18:41,320
you know, in in the newspaper
industry, there's an old line.

329
00:18:41,320 --> 00:18:46,560
If it bleeds, it leads.
And so saturating our minds with

330
00:18:46,560 --> 00:18:51,000
what we're perceived to be the
dangers of our culture, Parents

331
00:18:51,000 --> 00:18:53,840
in elite, even back in the 90s
started this development of sort

332
00:18:53,840 --> 00:18:57,160
of safety ISM kind of kind of
bringing their kids maybe closer

333
00:18:57,160 --> 00:19:00,200
to home.
And, and as the rise of, you

334
00:19:00,200 --> 00:19:03,640
know, Internet culture in the
late 90s and video game systems

335
00:19:03,640 --> 00:19:06,600
and then phones in the mid
2000s, all that stuff sort of

336
00:19:06,600 --> 00:19:13,280
allowed parents to put their kid
at home and just put them in

337
00:19:13,280 --> 00:19:16,200
front of a screen and let that
thing take care of them.

338
00:19:16,880 --> 00:19:19,240
Whereas they didn't have to
worry about, you know, are they

339
00:19:19,240 --> 00:19:21,400
going to be home before the
street lights turn on?

340
00:19:22,240 --> 00:19:27,440
And that that has some some
ramifications that that we're

341
00:19:27,640 --> 00:19:31,200
we're still kind of seeing.
But that idea of safety ISM we

342
00:19:31,200 --> 00:19:34,240
felt like the world became too
dangerous because we just saw

343
00:19:34,240 --> 00:19:37,240
news stories all the time about
things that were dangerous.

344
00:19:37,840 --> 00:19:41,480
Parents that grew up in the 70s.
There's there's all kinds of

345
00:19:41,480 --> 00:19:43,200
serial killer.
If you ever watch serial killer

346
00:19:43,200 --> 00:19:46,960
documentaries, it seems like the
70s was the time where all the

347
00:19:46,960 --> 00:19:50,040
serial killers live.
Unsolved Mysteries, Dateline,

348
00:19:50,040 --> 00:19:53,920
all those things have helped us
go and we look at the worst

349
00:19:53,920 --> 00:19:57,000
possible scenario and we go, I
don't want that to happen to my

350
00:19:57,000 --> 00:19:59,800
child.
And I think, well for me and I

351
00:19:59,800 --> 00:20:01,840
don't, I think both of y'all
grew up in, you grew up in

352
00:20:01,840 --> 00:20:03,800
Memphis, you grew up in
Charleston.

353
00:20:04,880 --> 00:20:07,560
So larger towns, I grew up in a
small town in Arkansas, so I

354
00:20:07,560 --> 00:20:10,560
could walk to school because I
live 2 blocks away from school

355
00:20:10,920 --> 00:20:13,480
during the summer, I could ride
my bike like four or five blocks

356
00:20:13,480 --> 00:20:14,920
away to the post office, get
mail.

357
00:20:14,920 --> 00:20:16,920
Like my parents are at work,
like they don't know where I'm

358
00:20:16,920 --> 00:20:18,000
at.
I could just decide, you know

359
00:20:18,000 --> 00:20:20,200
what, I'm going to go get the
mail today and stuff.

360
00:20:21,040 --> 00:20:22,680
And I was looking, you were
teaching.

361
00:20:22,680 --> 00:20:25,440
I was like, I don't allow my
kids that level of freedom.

362
00:20:26,080 --> 00:20:28,880
How can I, you know, start
thinking, how can I incorporate

363
00:20:28,880 --> 00:20:31,200
some of that level of freedom?
Because even when my, some of my

364
00:20:31,200 --> 00:20:32,600
girls like, can we run around
the neighborhood?

365
00:20:32,600 --> 00:20:36,640
I'm like, have fun with you.
Stay in this part of the

366
00:20:36,640 --> 00:20:40,440
neighborhood, you know, and is
they're probably fairly safe,

367
00:20:40,440 --> 00:20:43,840
but you know, you hear horror
stories of missing and doing sex

368
00:20:43,840 --> 00:20:46,560
trafficking and stuff like that.
And you're like, how do we,

369
00:20:46,560 --> 00:20:49,320
what's the balance?
And the And the irony is that

370
00:20:50,320 --> 00:20:55,120
statistics wise, our kids are
actually safer today in public

371
00:20:55,120 --> 00:20:57,640
spaces than they've really ever
been.

372
00:20:58,480 --> 00:21:01,800
And yet it's the time when we're
most controlling about where

373
00:21:01,800 --> 00:21:03,520
they are.
And like, and I'm with you, like

374
00:21:03,800 --> 00:21:06,400
my neighborhood doesn't have
like, amenities.

375
00:21:06,400 --> 00:21:09,160
So there's not like a pool or a
clubhouse or that kind of stuff.

376
00:21:09,800 --> 00:21:13,200
And it's not, it's not like in a
top area of town.

377
00:21:13,320 --> 00:21:16,160
And so, yeah, like I'm, I'm not
in a place where I feel

378
00:21:16,160 --> 00:21:18,680
comfortable just letting my kids
kind of wander the neighborhood

379
00:21:18,680 --> 00:21:21,360
like I did at their age growing
up.

380
00:21:22,400 --> 00:21:27,280
But but that you know, that it
it, it's interesting that we

381
00:21:27,280 --> 00:21:30,240
did, we did this sort of
inverted ratio where we started

382
00:21:30,240 --> 00:21:33,240
pulling them in from the
physical world and

383
00:21:33,240 --> 00:21:36,920
overprotecting in the physical
space and absolutely under

384
00:21:36,920 --> 00:21:39,560
protecting the digital space.
And I think the beginnings of it

385
00:21:39,560 --> 00:21:42,200
were just a lot of parents just
didn't know what was going on.

386
00:21:42,200 --> 00:21:44,760
Parents that were that grew up
totally analog.

387
00:21:45,240 --> 00:21:48,160
The digital revolution was like
a like, I don't even know what's

388
00:21:48,160 --> 00:21:50,120
going on.
Like my kids are just over there

389
00:21:50,120 --> 00:21:51,840
playing with some fancy game in
it.

390
00:21:51,840 --> 00:21:54,200
That's fine, it's whatever.
But.

391
00:21:54,800 --> 00:21:57,920
Do you think parents of our
generation, because Internet was

392
00:21:57,920 --> 00:22:01,600
hitting when I was in maybe 9th
grade, of course, you all like

393
00:22:01,600 --> 00:22:04,600
grew up with the Internet.
Do you think that we're a little

394
00:22:04,600 --> 00:22:07,200
bit more savvy to the dangers of
the Internet?

395
00:22:07,200 --> 00:22:11,240
Maybe that's changed some of
this because we saw it younger,

396
00:22:11,240 --> 00:22:15,200
whereas, you know, parents of,
you know, maybe your parents

397
00:22:15,200 --> 00:22:17,680
didn't have that so that you
were maybe let loose.

398
00:22:17,680 --> 00:22:20,360
I don't know, maybe generational
thing?

399
00:22:20,520 --> 00:22:25,000
I think this generation
definitely has a better handle

400
00:22:25,000 --> 00:22:29,360
on what it is because like so I,
I had sort of 1/2 and half like

401
00:22:29,360 --> 00:22:33,400
so the, the millennials, it was
like a good chunk of my

402
00:22:33,400 --> 00:22:35,960
childhood and formative years.
We're pretty much analog now.

403
00:22:35,960 --> 00:22:40,080
We had ATV like there was cable
once in a while, but, and we got

404
00:22:40,080 --> 00:22:43,640
like a Nintendo Entertainment
System when I was, I don't know,

405
00:22:43,640 --> 00:22:45,440
nine years old or so.
We could play Duck Hunt or

406
00:22:45,440 --> 00:22:51,760
something like that.
But I think I think parents of

407
00:22:51,760 --> 00:22:57,040
my age in general are a little
bit more savvy about what the

408
00:22:57,040 --> 00:23:00,480
negative ramifications are.
But I'll, but I'll actually tell

409
00:23:00,480 --> 00:23:03,200
you where I think the, the major
hope is.

410
00:23:03,200 --> 00:23:07,560
I think it's the generation
after me because there's there's

411
00:23:07,560 --> 00:23:12,040
some recent reports out from
like the Coulson Center little

412
00:23:12,040 --> 00:23:15,560
plug for those Coulson fellows
out there that that Gen.

413
00:23:15,560 --> 00:23:19,560
Z is actually starting to sat.
There's some there's some

414
00:23:19,560 --> 00:23:23,080
preliminary data that says Gen.
Z is starting to sour on some

415
00:23:23,080 --> 00:23:24,960
social media.
And I think a lot of it has to

416
00:23:24,960 --> 00:23:28,160
do with, like you said, how
free, how free they are to talk

417
00:23:28,160 --> 00:23:32,760
about mental health issues and
then sort of the overwhelming

418
00:23:32,760 --> 00:23:36,240
realization of where those
mental health issues are a lot

419
00:23:36,240 --> 00:23:42,240
of a lot of times stemming from.
And, and that's again, major

420
00:23:42,240 --> 00:23:44,440
deal.
But I, I think this generation

421
00:23:44,440 --> 00:23:49,480
might, I think generation of
parents my age has an idea, but

422
00:23:49,480 --> 00:23:52,120
I really think the cultural
tide, Gen.

423
00:23:52,120 --> 00:23:55,080
Z has the opportunity to turn
the cultural tide in a way that

424
00:23:55,080 --> 00:24:00,640
millennials, we may have lost
that by just a couple of years.

425
00:24:01,680 --> 00:24:02,440
Good.
Did you have?

426
00:24:02,560 --> 00:24:05,760
Yeah, I was going to say I was
curious to, well, I was going to

427
00:24:05,760 --> 00:24:07,440
make a comment just probably
come later.

428
00:24:07,440 --> 00:24:11,520
But you know, it's not the same
as social media, but a lot of

429
00:24:11,520 --> 00:24:14,640
these people, a lot of people a
little bit older than I do sit

430
00:24:14,640 --> 00:24:18,520
in front of Fox News or CNN all
day every and it feeds them in a

431
00:24:18,520 --> 00:24:19,920
different way.
They're not swiping, but it's

432
00:24:19,920 --> 00:24:23,520
like maybe a lesser screen
that's like doing that.

433
00:24:23,960 --> 00:24:25,400
And then I was gonna say you
have.

434
00:24:25,400 --> 00:24:28,320
The 24 Hour News.
It's like all the time.

435
00:24:28,360 --> 00:24:31,320
And because we do have our
phones, there are the there is

436
00:24:31,320 --> 00:24:33,920
that girl that went to the
mailbox got abducted and that's

437
00:24:33,920 --> 00:24:36,640
on we've got like some video
where we didn't even have video

438
00:24:36,640 --> 00:24:38,040
before words.
So that's more real.

439
00:24:39,120 --> 00:24:41,840
My question for you guys, when
did you all get cell phones?

440
00:24:41,840 --> 00:24:44,320
Just, you know, thinking about
our ages and where we were, I

441
00:24:44,320 --> 00:24:47,360
know I was on my 13th birthday.
I was allowed to get a cell

442
00:24:47,360 --> 00:24:51,280
phone, but the coolest thing our
cell phones did was like go

443
00:24:51,280 --> 00:24:53,000
through ringtones.
Like we spent a lot of time,

444
00:24:53,000 --> 00:24:55,640
like with my ringtone, we could
play snake.

445
00:24:56,360 --> 00:24:58,680
Maybe there was like if you had
like a BlackBerry, you could do

446
00:24:58,680 --> 00:25:01,760
the little brick breaker thing.
But I'm just curious where you

447
00:25:01,760 --> 00:25:03,960
guys were introduced to some of
this technology.

448
00:25:03,960 --> 00:25:07,520
Yeah.
I got my first cell phone after

449
00:25:07,520 --> 00:25:10,000
I graduated to high school or
maybe at the very end of high

450
00:25:10,000 --> 00:25:14,240
school, and it was merely for
safety travelling back and

451
00:25:14,240 --> 00:25:15,680
forth.
And it was one of those things

452
00:25:15,680 --> 00:25:19,360
like you have so many minutes
and don't even dare think about

453
00:25:19,360 --> 00:25:20,920
texting 'cause it's like 1/4.
It was.

454
00:25:21,200 --> 00:25:23,880
Yeah, it was.
Crazy expensive even and if

455
00:25:23,880 --> 00:25:25,880
someone texted you, you still
had to pay for it.

456
00:25:25,880 --> 00:25:26,840
It's like.
Don't text.

457
00:25:26,840 --> 00:25:28,360
Don't text.
Me.

458
00:25:28,640 --> 00:25:30,560
And so.
They don't send a text as it's

459
00:25:30,560 --> 00:25:33,320
like OK oh man what a waste of a
word.

460
00:25:33,360 --> 00:25:36,960
Right, right.
And so then probably the first

461
00:25:36,960 --> 00:25:44,880
smart device I got was an iPod
Touch, which was like an iPhone

462
00:25:44,880 --> 00:25:47,840
but not a phone because I still
had like I had a BlackBerry for

463
00:25:47,840 --> 00:25:52,160
my work and I had an iPod touch
just for, you know, like a

464
00:25:52,160 --> 00:25:55,160
digital.
I'll say digital assistant, 7th,

465
00:25:55,160 --> 00:25:57,200
8th grade.
Not a phone, but Palm Pilots

466
00:25:57,200 --> 00:25:58,840
were like a thing for a little
bit of high school.

467
00:25:58,840 --> 00:26:01,480
Like we all got them like as
like kids anyway.

468
00:26:01,840 --> 00:26:03,760
Whip out the stylus.
Yeah, yeah.

469
00:26:03,760 --> 00:26:06,480
And it didn't really work well.
Like the stylist didn't write

470
00:26:06,480 --> 00:26:08,320
like it was really difficult to
work with.

471
00:26:08,960 --> 00:26:14,960
I think I got a flip phone when
I was 16 because I was driving

472
00:26:15,240 --> 00:26:18,760
to school and driving a friend
of mine to school.

473
00:26:18,960 --> 00:26:21,920
And I think that was the the
time when my parents were oh,

474
00:26:21,960 --> 00:26:24,120
and my brother.
It must have been when my

475
00:26:24,120 --> 00:26:28,360
brother went to college because
then he wasn't the driver

476
00:26:28,360 --> 00:26:30,240
anymore.
I was the driver for me and my

477
00:26:30,240 --> 00:26:32,880
friends.
And so then that was it.

478
00:26:33,040 --> 00:26:36,880
So I was probably 16 when that
happened, 16 or or 17.

479
00:26:37,600 --> 00:26:38,920
And it was, yeah, it was a flip
phone.

480
00:26:38,920 --> 00:26:40,520
It was T9 texting.
And so, yeah.

481
00:26:40,520 --> 00:26:44,240
T9 texting.
Trying to explain that to to

482
00:26:44,280 --> 00:26:47,840
middle schoolers today, like
what it was like to have to run

483
00:26:47,840 --> 00:26:50,400
through that system texting.
Well, there was the one where

484
00:26:50,400 --> 00:26:52,840
you had to push them over and
over again and it'll be like

485
00:26:52,840 --> 00:26:55,000
ABC.
And then and then there was the

486
00:26:55,000 --> 00:26:58,080
one where it was predictive, so
you could just hit the letter

487
00:26:58,120 --> 00:26:59,880
and it would kind of give you
some options.

488
00:27:00,640 --> 00:27:02,360
That was a big step up.
In technology, Cool.

489
00:27:02,840 --> 00:27:06,640
And even I remember as like
prior on that, it's like 1312,

490
00:27:06,640 --> 00:27:10,440
like you're on the Internet, you
got mail a well, it's like even

491
00:27:10,440 --> 00:27:13,080
some of that like dial up stuff
while it's dialing up, I could

492
00:27:13,080 --> 00:27:15,000
do some play based interaction.
I got some time to kill.

493
00:27:15,000 --> 00:27:18,040
It's gonna be 3 minutes before I
can get on my e-mail and instant

494
00:27:18,040 --> 00:27:21,840
messenger.
So Jonathan, you talked about

495
00:27:22,040 --> 00:27:27,600
the real life play.
So there's a cycle kind of at

496
00:27:27,600 --> 00:27:29,640
home base.
I've learned from my previous

497
00:27:29,640 --> 00:27:35,160
adventure, I go out, I risk
some, I get scared, some I come

498
00:27:35,160 --> 00:27:39,560
back, I get comforted and then I
do that cycle over again.

499
00:27:40,720 --> 00:27:45,120
And then for digital, there's
kind of a different cycle, this

500
00:27:45,520 --> 00:27:47,680
dopamine pathway.
Do you want to talk about how

501
00:27:47,680 --> 00:27:50,400
that differs between the two of
those?

502
00:27:50,400 --> 00:27:52,320
Yeah, for sure.
And and there was a good example

503
00:27:52,320 --> 00:27:54,600
that I had in my notes to share
on Sunday.

504
00:27:54,600 --> 00:27:56,920
And I just, I told Kenya
afterwards, I was like, I didn't

505
00:27:56,920 --> 00:27:59,440
look at my notes enough.
I had things I wanted to say and

506
00:27:59,440 --> 00:28:00,480
I just didn't get.
I've been there.

507
00:28:00,600 --> 00:28:03,000
So.
Been there, done so that that

508
00:28:03,440 --> 00:28:05,760
that attachment system that
you're talking about where?

509
00:28:05,760 --> 00:28:09,920
Where kids reach out from a
secure base, they do something a

510
00:28:09,920 --> 00:28:13,640
little bit risky and then they
kind of see the reward or lack

511
00:28:13,640 --> 00:28:16,240
of reward and they get a little
bit anxious if they're going too

512
00:28:16,240 --> 00:28:18,080
far.
And then they run back to that

513
00:28:18,080 --> 00:28:21,520
secure base to, to get kind of
reaffirmed and feel good about

514
00:28:21,520 --> 00:28:23,960
what they did.
The, the example that I have is

515
00:28:23,960 --> 00:28:27,400
our, our daughter Everly, who is
5.

516
00:28:28,000 --> 00:28:30,640
We have these plastic knives
that we bought that are like

517
00:28:30,640 --> 00:28:32,240
designed for kids to be able to
use.

518
00:28:32,240 --> 00:28:33,880
So like cut their own fruit and
stuff.

519
00:28:34,600 --> 00:28:37,080
And they're designed not to
really be able to cut you very

520
00:28:37,080 --> 00:28:38,320
easily.
Like you really kind of have to

521
00:28:38,320 --> 00:28:40,240
work at it if you're going to
cut your hand with it.

522
00:28:40,600 --> 00:28:43,960
If you play spoons with plastic
knives they will cut you.

523
00:28:45,120 --> 00:28:46,600
Just APSA for everyone out
there.

524
00:28:47,000 --> 00:28:49,760
Not that anyone's tried it
before, but Michael's hands so I

525
00:28:49,760 --> 00:28:53,160
can see the scars.
Actually there may be a a story

526
00:28:53,160 --> 00:28:55,480
that needs to be revisited in
that at some point.

527
00:28:57,080 --> 00:28:59,280
Playing spoons with knives I
just it.

528
00:28:59,400 --> 00:29:01,440
Seems all right.
We'll leave it.

529
00:29:01,440 --> 00:29:06,320
We'll leave it there for now.
She so I've I've shown her maybe

530
00:29:06,560 --> 00:29:08,760
twice.
We get the little, it's a little

531
00:29:08,760 --> 00:29:12,880
serrated kind of silicone or
plastic knife.

532
00:29:12,880 --> 00:29:15,640
And, and it's, it's serrated, so
you have to kind of push it

533
00:29:15,640 --> 00:29:18,200
forward to make it cut through
whatever you're trying to cut.

534
00:29:18,440 --> 00:29:21,800
And I've shown her, you know
where to put your fingers and

535
00:29:21,800 --> 00:29:24,360
then go ahead and slice down and
make sure it's on a flat

536
00:29:24,360 --> 00:29:26,760
surface.
And I think probably I've done

537
00:29:26,760 --> 00:29:30,320
it twice with her holding her
hand and holding her fingers and

538
00:29:30,320 --> 00:29:34,680
showing her how it goes.
Well, the other day I literally

539
00:29:35,960 --> 00:29:39,000
think I was sitting staring at
this computer working on this

540
00:29:39,000 --> 00:29:40,920
presentation for one of the
Sundays.

541
00:29:41,760 --> 00:29:47,360
And she came up to me and she
was like on the verge of tears.

542
00:29:47,360 --> 00:29:50,360
Like you could see some tears in
her eyes, like a little bit of

543
00:29:50,360 --> 00:29:52,760
watery.
And, and she was holding up her

544
00:29:52,760 --> 00:29:55,600
hand and there was like a little
red mark on one of her fingers.

545
00:29:56,400 --> 00:29:58,160
And I said, you know, I said
what you, what happened?

546
00:29:58,440 --> 00:30:01,320
And she explained that she, she
wanted strawberries and shows

547
00:30:01,320 --> 00:30:04,040
she got strawberries out of the
fridge, which that's good or she

548
00:30:04,040 --> 00:30:06,600
could do that.
But then without me knowing, she

549
00:30:06,600 --> 00:30:09,480
went and got that little plastic
knife that we use and she had

550
00:30:09,480 --> 00:30:13,400
tried it on her own.
And I was really proud of her

551
00:30:13,480 --> 00:30:16,920
that she went and she realized I
want this strawberry cut because

552
00:30:16,920 --> 00:30:19,200
she she doesn't want the green
stuff on the top of it.

553
00:30:19,440 --> 00:30:21,760
And so she decided she wanted
that strawberry cut.

554
00:30:21,760 --> 00:30:24,440
She went and got the knife,
never said anything to me about

555
00:30:24,440 --> 00:30:28,160
it, and then tries it herself.
But when she got to the point of

556
00:30:28,440 --> 00:30:31,640
fear, it slipped out of the way.
The knife hit her finger.

557
00:30:31,760 --> 00:30:34,400
Now it wasn't like it was a tiny
little scratch.

558
00:30:34,400 --> 00:30:36,320
It wasn't even something I was
going to put a Band-Aid on.

559
00:30:36,320 --> 00:30:40,160
It was just a little impression.
But she walked up to me and that

560
00:30:40,160 --> 00:30:43,000
and that was that she was
returning to a secure base.

561
00:30:43,360 --> 00:30:46,560
And then what did I do?
We we walked over and looked at

562
00:30:46,560 --> 00:30:49,040
the situation and helped her
understand how to kind of

563
00:30:49,040 --> 00:30:50,480
position things a little bit
better.

564
00:30:50,880 --> 00:30:53,880
I showed her again, but then I
didn't put my hands on it

565
00:30:53,880 --> 00:30:55,440
whenever she was going to
actually do it.

566
00:30:55,600 --> 00:30:58,760
And so that, that that cycle is
so healthy, like to encourage

567
00:30:58,760 --> 00:31:03,040
independence, to affirm, you
know, what they've done.

568
00:31:03,040 --> 00:31:05,920
And then when they get a little
bit anxious or fearful because

569
00:31:05,920 --> 00:31:08,280
they may have gone too far,
they're running back to that

570
00:31:08,280 --> 00:31:10,520
secure base.
That's a beautiful structure.

571
00:31:10,840 --> 00:31:15,040
But in the, in the social media
world there, there's a, there's

572
00:31:15,040 --> 00:31:18,720
a whole different structure
that's not, that doesn't really

573
00:31:19,400 --> 00:31:23,000
require, you know, return to
safe base.

574
00:31:23,640 --> 00:31:27,040
There's a cycle that looks a lot
like an addiction cycle.

575
00:31:27,680 --> 00:31:32,360
And so it starts with some kind
of trigger, some something, and

576
00:31:32,360 --> 00:31:34,720
usually on a social media app,
you know, it's those push

577
00:31:34,720 --> 00:31:37,480
notifications, they, they pop up
and tell you something has

578
00:31:37,480 --> 00:31:39,480
happened and you need to know
about it.

579
00:31:39,800 --> 00:31:42,640
And so after that you perform an
action.

580
00:31:42,640 --> 00:31:44,840
So you tap on it.
Or if you're at a computer, you

581
00:31:44,840 --> 00:31:47,560
know, you click on something.
And, and the social media

582
00:31:47,560 --> 00:31:50,400
companies that are really smart
have have learned to be like

583
00:31:50,400 --> 00:31:53,120
casinos where they give kind of
variable rewards.

584
00:31:53,120 --> 00:31:55,600
It's not not every time you go
to the app are you going to get

585
00:31:55,600 --> 00:31:58,440
something that you really like.
Sometimes it's going to be

586
00:31:58,440 --> 00:32:00,360
something really good, like
you're going to see somebody

587
00:32:00,360 --> 00:32:02,800
comments it on your photo or
somebody liked something.

588
00:32:03,200 --> 00:32:06,200
But sometimes it just pops up
with a push notification to say,

589
00:32:06,200 --> 00:32:07,800
hey, we thought you might want
to see this.

590
00:32:07,800 --> 00:32:10,440
And you're like, I don't, I
don't care anything about that.

591
00:32:10,840 --> 00:32:13,960
But they're just trying to get
you into the app over and over

592
00:32:13,960 --> 00:32:19,360
and over again, sometimes with a
reward, knowing that if one out

593
00:32:19,360 --> 00:32:24,160
of every 8-9 or ten times you
get into that app, something

594
00:32:24,680 --> 00:32:28,160
triggers a dopamine release, the
anticipation of the next

595
00:32:28,160 --> 00:32:30,160
dopamine release is even
greater.

596
00:32:30,160 --> 00:32:32,560
And it just gets you into this
this cycle.

597
00:32:32,560 --> 00:32:37,320
So from the trigger to the
action to that variable reward,

598
00:32:38,120 --> 00:32:40,520
to some investment in the app
where you're putting part of

599
00:32:40,520 --> 00:32:42,840
yourself in the app.
I mentioned Myspace because that

600
00:32:42,840 --> 00:32:45,000
was where we put all of
ourselves in middle school.

601
00:32:45,000 --> 00:32:47,200
Our whole life was going to be
displayed on that page.

602
00:32:47,200 --> 00:32:49,880
The colors were important, the
music playing in the background

603
00:32:49,880 --> 00:32:51,960
was important.
Your top eight friends was

604
00:32:51,960 --> 00:32:54,160
really important.
And if you switched it out,

605
00:32:54,320 --> 00:32:56,440
people were going to notice and
they were going to say something

606
00:32:56,440 --> 00:32:57,920
like you were going to cause
some drama.

607
00:32:58,680 --> 00:33:01,600
So all of that stuff, we
invested ourselves into that.

608
00:33:01,600 --> 00:33:04,880
And that meant that for the
future, now that I'm invested in

609
00:33:04,880 --> 00:33:08,760
this social media situation, I
don't always need an external

610
00:33:08,760 --> 00:33:10,960
trigger to make me want to go to
the app.

611
00:33:10,960 --> 00:33:14,200
Sometimes I just haven't.
I just a thought, I posted

612
00:33:14,200 --> 00:33:16,240
something a while ago.
I wonder if anybody's seen it

613
00:33:16,560 --> 00:33:17,960
and it.
And so all of a sudden this

614
00:33:17,960 --> 00:33:21,920
cycle is, is it's a cycle of
addiction because of the

615
00:33:21,920 --> 00:33:24,640
variable reward and because of
the dopamine that comes from

616
00:33:24,640 --> 00:33:27,880
those variable rewards.
It is an addictive cycle.

617
00:33:27,880 --> 00:33:29,480
And social media companies know
this.

618
00:33:29,480 --> 00:33:32,120
And we know from internal
documents that whistleblowers

619
00:33:32,120 --> 00:33:34,400
have shared or that have been
shared through Freedom of

620
00:33:34,400 --> 00:33:38,480
Information Act or that kind of
thing, We know that social media

621
00:33:38,480 --> 00:33:45,640
developers are keenly aware of
the psychology of addiction and

622
00:33:45,640 --> 00:33:49,360
the psychology of adolescents.
And there's just a huge

623
00:33:49,360 --> 00:33:53,040
incentive for social media
companies to get a massive

624
00:33:53,040 --> 00:33:56,240
consumer base that will always
be a consumer base for them

625
00:33:56,440 --> 00:33:58,680
because they get to sell ad
space that way, right?

626
00:33:58,680 --> 00:34:01,760
That that determines their
numbers for their cash flow.

627
00:34:02,600 --> 00:34:07,680
And they're good at this, like
the the social media apps, I

628
00:34:07,680 --> 00:34:10,760
heard someone say early on in
the sort of social media

629
00:34:10,760 --> 00:34:15,120
revolution, if the, if the
product is free, you are the

630
00:34:15,120 --> 00:34:17,600
product, right?
Yeah, there's a whole Netflix

631
00:34:17,600 --> 00:34:19,280
special.
I think it was on Netflix.

632
00:34:19,280 --> 00:34:21,280
Yeah, they have like the social,
whatever it's called, but they

633
00:34:21,320 --> 00:34:22,400
did a really good job.
Yeah.

634
00:34:22,400 --> 00:34:24,360
And.
It's how they like curate your

635
00:34:24,360 --> 00:34:27,560
doom scrolling feed and stuff
and how they know like how how

636
00:34:27,600 --> 00:34:30,000
how fast and how long exactly
what you want to see they.

637
00:34:30,040 --> 00:34:32,760
They have all the numbers and
like from what I understand,

638
00:34:32,760 --> 00:34:35,639
it's like, you know, people that
engineer this stuff is like my

639
00:34:35,639 --> 00:34:38,239
kids not allowed on this because
I know how addictive it is,

640
00:34:38,360 --> 00:34:40,960
right, right.
And, and go into that like real

641
00:34:40,960 --> 00:34:45,520
life playing versus the digital.
Even when things go bad in real

642
00:34:45,520 --> 00:34:48,239
life and you are anxious and
nervous, it's just a different

643
00:34:48,239 --> 00:34:52,480
feeling than when you're
scrolling and like it just zaps

644
00:34:52,480 --> 00:34:54,600
the lifeout.
You like know it's not good.

645
00:34:54,600 --> 00:34:56,320
Like even when you mess up in
real life, you're like, oh, this

646
00:34:56,320 --> 00:34:57,760
was not good.
But it's like a totally

647
00:34:57,760 --> 00:35:00,680
different feeling in my mind.
Well, in real life, you can do

648
00:35:00,680 --> 00:35:01,840
something about it.
That's right.

649
00:35:01,880 --> 00:35:04,400
Right.
So like if, if I if Everly when

650
00:35:04,400 --> 00:35:07,800
she slipped with the knife, the
strawberry popped out of the way

651
00:35:07,800 --> 00:35:10,840
and she hit her finger with that
little part of that knife, she

652
00:35:10,840 --> 00:35:13,080
could do something about it
because that's a real world

653
00:35:13,080 --> 00:35:15,240
scenario and she can run back to
a secure base.

654
00:35:15,600 --> 00:35:19,160
If something makes me feel
anxious or fearful or awful

655
00:35:19,160 --> 00:35:23,160
online, there's there's not
really a recourse.

656
00:35:23,160 --> 00:35:26,080
Like there's not a lot I can do.
I mean, I can fire off in the

657
00:35:26,080 --> 00:35:30,640
comment section, but but you're
right, there's especially.

658
00:35:30,640 --> 00:35:34,840
If you're an adolescent, maybe
even less well prepared to do

659
00:35:34,840 --> 00:35:36,560
something about it, maybe you
don't say anything.

660
00:35:36,560 --> 00:35:39,240
Maybe that haunts your.
It just builds up.

661
00:35:39,280 --> 00:35:40,920
Yeah, it just builds up.
Absolutely.

662
00:35:41,040 --> 00:35:43,040
Yep.
All right.

663
00:35:43,040 --> 00:35:49,120
So I'm guessing that many of our
listeners really relate to what

664
00:35:49,120 --> 00:35:52,120
you're talking through 'cause
maybe they have had that their

665
00:35:52,120 --> 00:35:56,000
own experience, like complaining
on Facebook about getting 15,000

666
00:35:56,000 --> 00:35:58,720
words about it freezing and then
going down and see 06 people

667
00:35:58,720 --> 00:36:01,000
laughed at that.
I guess I said something pretty

668
00:36:01,000 --> 00:36:02,880
funny.
Not that I just not that that

669
00:36:02,880 --> 00:36:07,120
just happened for me.
So we probably really relate to

670
00:36:07,200 --> 00:36:08,960
that.
And then hopefully you're going,

671
00:36:08,960 --> 00:36:15,160
man, if I am in this trap, how
much more so than maybe my kids.

672
00:36:15,960 --> 00:36:21,040
So maybe you could speak as
we're drawing, we're kind of

673
00:36:21,560 --> 00:36:24,360
this, maybe we should have
scheduled 2, but maybe you can

674
00:36:24,360 --> 00:36:28,960
speak quickly to the evaluative
value you say that word.

675
00:36:29,160 --> 00:36:32,440
Evaluative.
Process for what's good in our

676
00:36:32,440 --> 00:36:35,160
life.
And then maybe a game plan

677
00:36:35,160 --> 00:36:42,000
overall for parents who are that
they got young kids, maybe maybe

678
00:36:42,000 --> 00:36:44,600
they've already unleash
Pandora's box.

679
00:36:44,600 --> 00:36:47,400
Is there a strategy for getting
Pandora in those types of

680
00:36:47,400 --> 00:36:49,120
things?
Yes, we don't have to follow the

681
00:36:49,120 --> 00:36:52,840
Greek myth on this one.
So the evaluative framework I

682
00:36:52,840 --> 00:36:54,560
think that Christians should
generally use.

683
00:36:54,560 --> 00:36:56,720
It's interesting.
We've been talking about Romans

684
00:36:56,720 --> 00:36:59,600
and a lot of a lot of what I
think about Christians

685
00:36:59,600 --> 00:37:04,080
evaluating their interactions
and their participation in

686
00:37:04,080 --> 00:37:09,520
things comes from Romans 13 and
14 and then First Corinthians 8

687
00:37:09,520 --> 00:37:10,880
through 10.
I think these are two really,

688
00:37:10,880 --> 00:37:14,600
really strong passages for it
because they're centered on for

689
00:37:14,600 --> 00:37:16,640
the most part, they're centered
on love.

690
00:37:16,920 --> 00:37:19,280
And that's that is a major
defining characteristic.

691
00:37:19,280 --> 00:37:22,760
So I think I think in terms of
kind of four laws that I want to

692
00:37:22,760 --> 00:37:26,640
run thing, I want to kind of let
this be my rubric if I'm

693
00:37:26,920 --> 00:37:29,800
considering involvement.
And the first one is, is what

694
00:37:29,800 --> 00:37:33,320
John Piper calls the the lowest
question that you should ask,

695
00:37:33,640 --> 00:37:36,880
Still an important one, but it's
the question of is it a sin,

696
00:37:37,160 --> 00:37:38,760
right?
So there we have clear commands

697
00:37:38,760 --> 00:37:41,440
in Scripture of things that fall
into the category of sin.

698
00:37:42,000 --> 00:37:45,520
Exodus 20 begins that process.
But then Paul gives us numerous

699
00:37:45,520 --> 00:37:47,720
different lists of things that
are sinful.

700
00:37:47,960 --> 00:37:51,560
And so we want to run things in
our life through that, that

701
00:37:51,560 --> 00:37:53,960
filter first, is it a sin?
Because that's a clear and

702
00:37:53,960 --> 00:37:56,120
obvious note, right?
If something falls in that

703
00:37:56,120 --> 00:37:58,680
category, I have to, I have to
step away from it.

704
00:37:58,680 --> 00:38:02,760
I have to remove myself.
But if it's not a sin, then you

705
00:38:02,760 --> 00:38:04,960
kind of have these further tiers
of questions.

706
00:38:04,960 --> 00:38:09,520
And so I call the next one the
law of honor and it's can I, can

707
00:38:09,520 --> 00:38:13,440
I honor God in it?
Which is a good question, but

708
00:38:13,440 --> 00:38:18,040
then it's do I honor God in it?
We look at 1st Corinthians 1031

709
00:38:18,040 --> 00:38:19,680
for that one and.
I'll say this is where I took

710
00:38:19,680 --> 00:38:23,280
action because I have some like
stupid games on my phone, like a

711
00:38:23,360 --> 00:38:27,240
little arcade games that are ad
based revenue and I'm like, OK,

712
00:38:27,480 --> 00:38:32,400
could I maybe conceivably, but
do I, I don't know, maybe I'm

713
00:38:32,400 --> 00:38:34,640
like what?
What is the real benefit?

714
00:38:34,720 --> 00:38:37,200
So those I just deleted them.
Yeah, just got rid of them.

715
00:38:37,200 --> 00:38:39,600
That's strong clash clans
really.

716
00:38:39,600 --> 00:38:41,640
Gone.
OK, that's been a raw.

717
00:38:41,640 --> 00:38:44,720
Stars gone, some other stuff
just gone.

718
00:38:44,760 --> 00:38:48,520
Like, you know, just so I just
don't have chess.

719
00:38:48,720 --> 00:38:51,480
Yeah, there's a mahjong game I
still have on because Phoebe

720
00:38:51,480 --> 00:38:54,160
likes to help match tiles.
So I feel like that is a way to

721
00:38:54,200 --> 00:38:55,960
go.
But I was like, so I evaluated

722
00:38:55,960 --> 00:39:00,160
like what?
What is God honoring and what am

723
00:39:00,160 --> 00:39:02,320
I God honoring?
And what is just really a

724
00:39:02,320 --> 00:39:05,320
resource suck on my life.
Get rid of it.

725
00:39:05,320 --> 00:39:08,280
And that's a really.
I mean, I'm telling and I, and I

726
00:39:08,280 --> 00:39:10,000
have to say it every time I talk
about these things.

727
00:39:10,000 --> 00:39:12,880
Like I, I like to put this
evaluative framework out there,

728
00:39:13,040 --> 00:39:14,920
but my life doesn't perfectly
follow this thing.

729
00:39:14,920 --> 00:39:17,920
Like I have to look, I have to
look at I, I love video games.

730
00:39:17,920 --> 00:39:21,120
I really enjoy playing video
games and I have to kind of

731
00:39:21,880 --> 00:39:25,520
really, I have had to take a
step back in certain areas of

732
00:39:25,520 --> 00:39:29,280
life and, and areas of games,
especially to go.

733
00:39:29,280 --> 00:39:31,880
Can I honor God in it?
Do I honor God in like that's a

734
00:39:31,920 --> 00:39:35,280
that's a really hard question to
have to be confronted with and

735
00:39:35,280 --> 00:39:38,200
go that that hurts sometimes
like that.

736
00:39:38,280 --> 00:39:41,680
There's a cut there.
The next one is the law of love

737
00:39:41,720 --> 00:39:45,160
and it's can I show love in it?
Can I show love in this activity

738
00:39:45,160 --> 00:39:47,000
or this involvement?
And will it cause a brother to

739
00:39:47,000 --> 00:39:49,240
stumble?
And that was I'm sure you guys

740
00:39:49,400 --> 00:39:51,640
have taken that up and we'll be
releasing that.

741
00:39:51,640 --> 00:39:52,480
Did we cover?
That.

742
00:39:55,040 --> 00:39:57,120
And that's a just the law of
love.

743
00:39:57,120 --> 00:40:00,720
Like is this something that I
can be involved in and not not

744
00:40:00,720 --> 00:40:08,040
'cause somebody else through my?
Desire to please myself even in

745
00:40:08,080 --> 00:40:10,920
a even in a maybe a good thing
or an OK thing.

746
00:40:12,040 --> 00:40:14,440
Is it going to cost somebody
else to stumble and then the

747
00:40:14,440 --> 00:40:17,320
last one is the the law of
expediency.

748
00:40:17,960 --> 00:40:20,280
And that is the question of does
it help me run?

749
00:40:20,360 --> 00:40:24,160
Is this something that and
that's John Piper has a great a

750
00:40:24,160 --> 00:40:27,760
great video great sermon on this
from Hebrews.

751
00:40:27,760 --> 00:40:31,320
Does it help me run laying aside
these these sins, but also

752
00:40:31,720 --> 00:40:35,200
everything that hinders us from.
Yeah, everything.

753
00:40:35,560 --> 00:40:39,360
And man, would you run life
through those four filters?

754
00:40:39,360 --> 00:40:42,440
You're like, I have to really be
careful.

755
00:40:42,640 --> 00:40:44,720
Yeah.
If you can expand this outside

756
00:40:44,720 --> 00:40:47,320
of social media, there's a lot
of things you can.

757
00:40:47,760 --> 00:40:48,720
Run this through.
Yeah.

758
00:40:49,520 --> 00:40:52,240
All right.
Game plan for for parents.

759
00:40:52,240 --> 00:40:56,720
I think if you got young parents
maybe the easiest thing is just

760
00:40:56,720 --> 00:41:00,320
delay screen time.
Yes, limit screen time.

761
00:41:00,320 --> 00:41:03,960
Oh well, limit screen time and
delay when you give them

762
00:41:03,960 --> 00:41:08,920
autonomous screen time like a
phone or a tablet.

763
00:41:08,920 --> 00:41:11,280
Well, and social media in
particular like that, that is

764
00:41:11,280 --> 00:41:14,240
the key.
So smartphones themselves are

765
00:41:14,240 --> 00:41:17,960
not designed in the same way as
social media apps.

766
00:41:18,160 --> 00:41:20,320
A smartphone is, is like a Swiss
army knife, right?

767
00:41:20,320 --> 00:41:21,840
It's not designed to be
addictive.

768
00:41:21,840 --> 00:41:25,160
It is a tool and it's a great
tool, but the social media, the.

769
00:41:25,800 --> 00:41:28,320
Tricorder.
Because you're making those

770
00:41:28,320 --> 00:41:28,920
noises.
I bet you could.

771
00:41:28,920 --> 00:41:32,960
I bet there's an app for it.
Yeah, probably.

772
00:41:33,920 --> 00:41:38,760
But yeah, So I would say yes,
managing screen time and then

773
00:41:38,760 --> 00:41:42,120
delaying the time before kids
get social media and really

774
00:41:42,120 --> 00:41:44,160
having the conversation with
your teens.

775
00:41:44,880 --> 00:41:47,160
Why, why do you want it?
Like why, why do you want the

776
00:41:47,160 --> 00:41:48,680
social media?
What do you think you're going

777
00:41:48,680 --> 00:41:51,400
to get out of it?
How are we going to use it as a

778
00:41:51,400 --> 00:41:53,480
family?
And I think one of the major

779
00:41:53,480 --> 00:41:56,960
things is having a family
technology philosophy and A and

780
00:41:57,000 --> 00:41:59,560
a family plan.
Like we, we've got to have a

781
00:41:59,560 --> 00:42:02,960
conversation in our families
where we go, what are these

782
00:42:02,960 --> 00:42:05,000
things for and how are we going
to use them?

783
00:42:05,000 --> 00:42:07,080
And what effect is that going to
have on us?

784
00:42:07,240 --> 00:42:09,840
And having those conversations,
especially when the kids get to

785
00:42:09,840 --> 00:42:14,000
have input, you know, parents
make the decisions.

786
00:42:14,320 --> 00:42:16,520
But when kids are at the table,
especially as they're getting

787
00:42:16,520 --> 00:42:21,160
older, preteens and teenagers,
they, they need to feel a sense

788
00:42:21,160 --> 00:42:23,480
of ownership in some decisions
that are being made Now,

789
00:42:23,480 --> 00:42:27,560
sometimes another idea is that
sometimes you just have to tell

790
00:42:27,560 --> 00:42:28,920
them, I know more than you and I
love you.

791
00:42:28,920 --> 00:42:30,880
And so I'm going to make the
right decision in this

792
00:42:30,880 --> 00:42:34,040
situation, whether or not you
understand it, because I know

793
00:42:34,040 --> 00:42:37,400
more than you and I love you.
But as often as possible when we

794
00:42:37,400 --> 00:42:41,560
can give preteens and teens
ownership, and really, I mean,

795
00:42:41,560 --> 00:42:44,120
it probably goes even further
down into adolescence when we

796
00:42:44,120 --> 00:42:48,040
can give them ownership in some
of the family decisions.

797
00:42:48,240 --> 00:42:50,200
At least let them have their
voice heard.

798
00:42:50,200 --> 00:42:52,040
Like what it what is your
thought on this?

799
00:42:52,040 --> 00:42:55,480
How are your friends using this?
What are you noticing that gives

800
00:42:55,480 --> 00:42:57,800
them some buy in?
And so it's not too late,

801
00:42:57,800 --> 00:43:01,360
whether you're just raising kids
now that it's going to be years

802
00:43:01,360 --> 00:43:05,280
before they get into cell phones
or whether you have teenagers

803
00:43:06,000 --> 00:43:09,000
that have already kind of dived
into this situation.

804
00:43:09,440 --> 00:43:13,120
It it is never too late to to
step back and have the

805
00:43:13,120 --> 00:43:16,480
conversation is, is this good
for us?

806
00:43:16,480 --> 00:43:19,360
What are we seeing here?
And I think it's fair to say as

807
00:43:19,360 --> 00:43:22,200
well that not all social media
is the same.

808
00:43:23,800 --> 00:43:27,440
Karis, we allowed her to have
the real and good reads.

809
00:43:27,480 --> 00:43:30,280
Those are two social media
platforms.

810
00:43:30,760 --> 00:43:34,200
I don't think they have.
Surely they have some of the

811
00:43:34,320 --> 00:43:38,640
addictive cycle built in because
they want, but I don't think

812
00:43:38,680 --> 00:43:41,760
from my understanding of this,
not quite as strong as like an

813
00:43:41,760 --> 00:43:45,440
Instagram or a Facebook.
And then there's some social

814
00:43:45,720 --> 00:43:49,760
things that we just, I feel like
the from the ground up are

815
00:43:50,320 --> 00:43:52,840
designed poorly.
I don't even know the one that's

816
00:43:53,040 --> 00:43:56,760
like makes messages disappear
that we just don't Snapchat.

817
00:43:56,880 --> 00:43:59,760
We just don't, Yeah, like we
just, that's just not ever going

818
00:43:59,760 --> 00:44:02,720
to be allowed at the my house.
That's right.

819
00:44:02,720 --> 00:44:03,960
Yeah.
With good, I haven't ever had a

820
00:44:03,960 --> 00:44:06,880
hard time just exiting good
reads.

821
00:44:07,080 --> 00:44:10,360
You know what I mean?
It is it's cool.

822
00:44:10,360 --> 00:44:12,480
It's great to see updates from
my favorite authors.

823
00:44:12,480 --> 00:44:18,720
But so family technology
philosophy, like talking about

824
00:44:18,720 --> 00:44:21,400
it as a family, having a plan
for how and where and I would

825
00:44:21,400 --> 00:44:25,800
even say where like so in my
family, I, I shared that my kids

826
00:44:25,800 --> 00:44:30,240
are, are 10/8 and five and we
don't really do screens during

827
00:44:30,240 --> 00:44:33,480
the week.
We do have some screen time on

828
00:44:33,480 --> 00:44:37,080
weekends and again, us a feature
of just our family schedule and

829
00:44:37,080 --> 00:44:41,680
how things work for us.
But my kids know that they're

830
00:44:41,680 --> 00:44:46,320
not allowed to have a tablet in
a room by themselves, right.

831
00:44:46,440 --> 00:44:49,480
So they're not allowed in
bedrooms even even at the ages

832
00:44:49,480 --> 00:44:51,920
of 1085.
They are aware that these are

833
00:44:51,920 --> 00:44:54,800
common area devices.
And so we don't we don't go off

834
00:44:54,800 --> 00:44:57,840
by ourselves with these devices.
So just having those sort of

835
00:44:57,840 --> 00:45:02,840
standards in the household is
really helpful and helps to move

836
00:45:02,840 --> 00:45:05,600
them in the right direction of
thinking, how should I be using

837
00:45:05,600 --> 00:45:08,080
this thing?
There's also that put off put

838
00:45:08,080 --> 00:45:09,920
on.
So if you are in a situation

839
00:45:09,920 --> 00:45:12,720
where you already have teens or
preteens and they have already

840
00:45:13,040 --> 00:45:15,960
kind of been in social media and
now you're going, we got to pull

841
00:45:15,960 --> 00:45:19,120
this thing back.
Be prepared to provide some

842
00:45:19,120 --> 00:45:21,800
alternatives because there's
going to be there's going to be

843
00:45:21,800 --> 00:45:23,720
a gap there.
It's not going to be a fun

844
00:45:23,720 --> 00:45:25,720
conversation.
Nobody's going to enjoy each

845
00:45:25,720 --> 00:45:27,200
other's company for a little
while.

846
00:45:27,400 --> 00:45:32,000
Especially I've heard 21 days is
like key to reset your dopamine

847
00:45:32,000 --> 00:45:37,040
cycle, so you may have to really
be present for those first three

848
00:45:37,040 --> 00:45:41,280
weeks while you're retraining
your kids minds and maybe even

849
00:45:41,280 --> 00:45:45,200
your mind to do some alternate
alternate things.

850
00:45:45,200 --> 00:45:47,280
It's going to be some family
board game time.

851
00:45:47,280 --> 00:45:49,440
It's going to be walks around
the neighborhood like we're

852
00:45:49,440 --> 00:45:51,920
going to find we're going to if
you really want to do this,

853
00:45:51,920 --> 00:45:55,360
you're going to find ways to
fill the space that was taken up

854
00:45:55,360 --> 00:45:57,840
by just that kind of social
media scrolling.

855
00:45:58,360 --> 00:46:00,680
But you, you do, if you're going
to take something away, you've

856
00:46:00,680 --> 00:46:02,360
got to put something in that
spot.

857
00:46:02,960 --> 00:46:05,120
And and boredom can be one of
those things.

858
00:46:05,160 --> 00:46:07,840
Boredom is good for kids.
It is one of the the times that

859
00:46:07,840 --> 00:46:14,080
our brains fire most uniquely
and, and well, and, and build

860
00:46:14,080 --> 00:46:17,040
important connections when we're
bored and have to kind of figure

861
00:46:17,040 --> 00:46:19,400
out what to do.
Yeah, that's those would be some

862
00:46:19,400 --> 00:46:23,800
things also modeling behaviors,
making sure that we are showing

863
00:46:23,800 --> 00:46:25,520
our kids what it looks like to
live.

864
00:46:25,520 --> 00:46:28,200
Get off your phone.
Yeah, that that, that's what I

865
00:46:28,200 --> 00:46:30,880
was going to say, 'cause I
think, you know, what are some

866
00:46:30,880 --> 00:46:32,680
practical ways?
I mean, I guess there's easy

867
00:46:32,680 --> 00:46:35,960
ways, just don't get on it.
But but it's different than

868
00:46:35,960 --> 00:46:38,960
something I feel like my
solution is just don't get on

869
00:46:38,960 --> 00:46:41,840
social media very much or like
take the app off.

870
00:46:41,840 --> 00:46:43,280
If I have to get on, I'll go
through the browser.

871
00:46:43,280 --> 00:46:45,000
Like just make it like a little
bit harder.

872
00:46:45,720 --> 00:46:48,560
But part of me is like, maybe
that's a bad way to look at it

873
00:46:48,560 --> 00:46:51,720
where, you know, 10 years ago
you could say, hey, I'm fighting

874
00:46:51,720 --> 00:46:53,320
pornography.
I'm getting rid of my computer.

875
00:46:53,840 --> 00:46:56,400
Can't really do that today
because it's so ubiquitous.

876
00:46:56,400 --> 00:46:59,560
So like, how are you going to
actually have a strategy and

877
00:46:59,560 --> 00:47:02,720
filters and things are good, but
what are you doing outside of

878
00:47:02,720 --> 00:47:05,760
that to help point you in the
right direction?

879
00:47:05,760 --> 00:47:08,520
And, you know, I don't know, but
these are things I've been

880
00:47:08,520 --> 00:47:10,920
thinking about because, you
know, it's to me, it's easy to

881
00:47:10,920 --> 00:47:12,480
be OK.
I just don't have any of these.

882
00:47:12,520 --> 00:47:15,440
But I don't know if that's a,
it's almost like thinking of

883
00:47:15,440 --> 00:47:18,920
Romans 14.
It's like maybe I'm the weaker

884
00:47:18,920 --> 00:47:20,640
brother here.
And I don't, I think alcohol,

885
00:47:20,720 --> 00:47:23,120
drinking alcohol is a sin.
So I'm just totally cutting off

886
00:47:23,480 --> 00:47:25,280
and, you know, I don't know.
So there, yeah.

887
00:47:25,280 --> 00:47:27,640
And there is there can be a
danger to doing this sort of

888
00:47:27,640 --> 00:47:31,640
monastery move where you just
pull way back from something

889
00:47:31,840 --> 00:47:35,640
because the reality is our kids
are going to be without us in

890
00:47:35,640 --> 00:47:38,200
this culture at some point.
So we got to do some heart.

891
00:47:38,760 --> 00:47:41,120
Yes, and that's, and that I
think a lot of it comes down to

892
00:47:41,120 --> 00:47:42,400
that.
And so there's, you know,

893
00:47:42,400 --> 00:47:44,560
there's family devotions,
there's time around the dinner

894
00:47:44,560 --> 00:47:46,640
table.
That's that's precious time.

895
00:47:47,200 --> 00:47:49,080
And we don't get that much of
it.

896
00:47:49,080 --> 00:47:53,600
Like we look at how long we have
with these kids.

897
00:47:53,600 --> 00:47:56,960
I'm looking at pictures of your
kids right now and Michael's got

898
00:47:56,960 --> 00:48:00,520
one that is in college and one
getting ready to go, right?

899
00:48:01,640 --> 00:48:08,280
And one in kindergarten.
So just, it's just, we just

900
00:48:08,280 --> 00:48:12,920
recognize the time is limited.
And so the, the job of the

901
00:48:12,920 --> 00:48:16,600
parent is, is to do that heart
training so that when we when we

902
00:48:16,600 --> 00:48:19,280
kind of release them, they've
had exposure to things that they

903
00:48:19,280 --> 00:48:21,920
need to have exposure to.
We've worked in their hearts.

904
00:48:21,920 --> 00:48:24,480
God, we've, I say, we've worked
in their hearts.

905
00:48:24,760 --> 00:48:26,640
We don't actually get to do the
work right.

906
00:48:26,880 --> 00:48:30,640
We are praying for them and then
doing our job and the Holy

907
00:48:30,640 --> 00:48:35,240
Spirit is going to enter into
that situation and do the work

908
00:48:35,240 --> 00:48:39,720
of molding hearts and changing
affections and bringing them

909
00:48:39,720 --> 00:48:43,040
into the mind of Christ.
But we, we just, we have the

910
00:48:43,040 --> 00:48:45,680
biggest role to play aside from
the Holy Spirit.

911
00:48:45,680 --> 00:48:48,120
The parents are the ones who had
that biggest role to play and we

912
00:48:48,120 --> 00:48:51,240
can't, we can't sleep on that.
It'd be interesting too.

913
00:48:51,280 --> 00:48:54,440
I've been thinking about, I
mean, you know, going through

914
00:48:54,440 --> 00:48:56,680
things like Facebook and this
kind of thing and just be like,

915
00:48:57,320 --> 00:49:01,200
who do I follow?
Like what is it putting in front

916
00:49:01,200 --> 00:49:04,280
of my face?
What am I idolizing just by what

917
00:49:04,360 --> 00:49:06,440
I picked to idolize?
Because there's probably certain

918
00:49:06,440 --> 00:49:10,440
things I can just like take off
because these people are just

919
00:49:10,440 --> 00:49:11,560
always pointing to certain
things.

920
00:49:11,560 --> 00:49:13,560
You know what I mean?
I don't know, think think could

921
00:49:13,560 --> 00:49:16,000
just like it's one of those
things where I think Facebook

922
00:49:16,000 --> 00:49:18,560
just makes you or any social
media just makes you think about

923
00:49:19,400 --> 00:49:22,240
put your focus on yourself so
much and what other people

924
00:49:22,240 --> 00:49:24,400
think.
And it's like maybe a little bit

925
00:49:24,400 --> 00:49:26,840
of that's OK, but I don't know.
I'm always trying to grapple

926
00:49:26,840 --> 00:49:30,680
with how much is is good to do
versus like, man, maybe I just

927
00:49:30,680 --> 00:49:32,640
need to not focus on myself so
much.

928
00:49:32,920 --> 00:49:34,560
Yeah, well, we want to keep
grappling.

929
00:49:34,560 --> 00:49:37,200
I mean, that's, that's, that's
the move is to keep grappling.

930
00:49:37,680 --> 00:49:40,280
So what I'm going to do is
you've taught two classes.

931
00:49:40,280 --> 00:49:42,680
Those are on determined Audio.
I'm going to link them in the

932
00:49:42,680 --> 00:49:48,080
description this Sunday.
So this podcast will hit before

933
00:49:48,080 --> 00:49:49,320
this happens.
We're going to have a panel

934
00:49:49,320 --> 00:49:54,400
discussion and so I will, if I
can remember, I'll go back and

935
00:49:54,520 --> 00:49:59,080
add that later to to this.
So maybe you can check back in

936
00:49:59,080 --> 00:50:03,720
and and find that there as well.
Any any like big major things we

937
00:50:03,720 --> 00:50:06,840
didn't cover or anything that
you want to add?

938
00:50:07,120 --> 00:50:09,800
There's just, I mean, there are
resources out there for for

939
00:50:09,800 --> 00:50:13,760
parents that are interested in
this topic and want to move.

940
00:50:13,880 --> 00:50:18,440
You have a list of resources and
maybe I could get a copy of

941
00:50:18,440 --> 00:50:20,800
those and link those in the
description as well it.

942
00:50:20,960 --> 00:50:22,240
Will be good.
I have a quick question.

943
00:50:22,240 --> 00:50:25,480
I don't know in in your research
or this guy's book, and I know

944
00:50:25,520 --> 00:50:27,520
it's all different probably
based on your feed and your

945
00:50:27,520 --> 00:50:28,640
tendencies and these kind of
things.

946
00:50:28,640 --> 00:50:31,520
But was there a correlation
between, man, you spend more

947
00:50:31,520 --> 00:50:34,680
than five hours a week, it's bad
news or that's where you see a

948
00:50:34,680 --> 00:50:37,160
huge uptick or is it doesn't
really matter?

949
00:50:37,280 --> 00:50:41,280
One of the stats that sticks out
in my mind just as a mind blower

950
00:50:41,680 --> 00:50:49,080
is that 3 plus hours of social
media a day for adolescents

951
00:50:49,480 --> 00:50:51,360
double S the risk of mental
illness.

952
00:50:51,880 --> 00:50:56,000
So, you know, major depressive
episodes, anxiety, suicidal

953
00:50:56,000 --> 00:50:59,840
ideation, these things, the, the
risk of those is doubled for

954
00:50:59,840 --> 00:51:05,240
three plus hours a day.
And your average adolescent, the

955
00:51:05,240 --> 00:51:09,240
statistics vary, but it's, it's
5 plus hours a day for your

956
00:51:09,680 --> 00:51:14,680
preteens and, and tweens and,
and up to maybe 7 to 8 hours a

957
00:51:14,680 --> 00:51:18,720
day for teenagers.
But the, the data also shows

958
00:51:18,720 --> 00:51:21,840
that teenagers that are, that
are given that like 7 to 8 hours

959
00:51:21,840 --> 00:51:25,320
a day when it, when the question
is asked a different way, they

960
00:51:25,320 --> 00:51:27,480
go.
I'm basically just continuously

961
00:51:27,480 --> 00:51:32,120
online, like I'm continuously
online as whenever I can be, I

962
00:51:32,120 --> 00:51:34,800
am.
And so that that number is

963
00:51:34,800 --> 00:51:39,000
alarming.
But there are resources, like I

964
00:51:39,000 --> 00:51:42,720
said, access.org, the Coulson
Center has great videos.

965
00:51:42,720 --> 00:51:44,920
The Anxious Generation is a good
book if you just want to make

966
00:51:44,920 --> 00:51:49,120
sure you read with discernment,
knowing the the ideas of the

967
00:51:49,120 --> 00:51:51,560
author.
Yeah, there's a lot of good

968
00:51:51,560 --> 00:51:53,840
stuff out there.
All right, Jonathan, thank you

969
00:51:53,840 --> 00:51:55,960
for being here.
Thank you for doing all this

970
00:51:55,960 --> 00:51:59,120
research.
I know this is like people ask

971
00:51:59,120 --> 00:52:01,040
me some stuff to teach them.
Like how long did you study for?

972
00:52:01,040 --> 00:52:04,160
Like it's like my whole life.
It's like, so I'm sure that some

973
00:52:04,160 --> 00:52:06,920
of this stuff you've been,
you've been kind of, it's not

974
00:52:06,920 --> 00:52:09,680
just like a single thing that
it's like you, you delve into

975
00:52:09,680 --> 00:52:11,800
it, you study it because that's
kind of what you're about

976
00:52:11,800 --> 00:52:14,440
leading and and helping shape
kids lives.

977
00:52:14,440 --> 00:52:17,760
So I appreciate.
That and next time about that

978
00:52:17,760 --> 00:52:19,680
green screen Oh yeah we'll.
Put, we'll figure.

979
00:52:19,680 --> 00:52:21,520
We'll figure something out and
we'll put.

980
00:52:21,560 --> 00:52:23,600
We'll put some if you want it to
be.

981
00:52:25,800 --> 00:52:27,920
Weather Top.
Back end weather top.

982
00:52:27,920 --> 00:52:29,480
Weather top.
OK, we'll do Weather top.

983
00:52:31,040 --> 00:52:32,440
All right, So I think our guest
has to.

984
00:52:32,920 --> 00:52:35,440
Has to close it out as well.
Do you remember the words?

985
00:52:36,400 --> 00:52:38,880
I feel like.
Just say what you thinking is

986
00:52:38,880 --> 00:52:39,960
that.
Oh, that would be good.

987
00:52:40,200 --> 00:52:43,240
From that from now on, the guest
just ended how you think it

988
00:52:43,280 --> 00:52:46,880
should go.
All right, that's our take.

989
00:52:48,000 --> 00:52:51,440
Nailed it.
Thanks for listening to Take

990
00:52:51,440 --> 00:52:53,640
Two.
Find us wherever you find

991
00:52:53,640 --> 00:52:56,160
podcasts and on YouTube for
those who want to watch our

992
00:52:56,160 --> 00:52:56,840
video cast.