Survival and Surrender, Part 2: A New Kind of Strength

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All right, we are back Part 2
with Brian and I mentioned the

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first part.
My father now passed away, lost

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his leg after a botched vein
replacement and and so I had,

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you know, basically lost blood
flow to his leg.

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It's pretty I think it's pretty
painful ordeal.

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He had to get it amputated, but
shortly following that, you

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know, once he was in good humor,
we there were some jokes that

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were made and I'm assuming
you've heard some too.

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Yes, that's right.
Often any of your favorites.

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One foot in the grave is a is a
good one.

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I have AT shirt that says
amputee some assembly required.

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That's that's my favorite
T-shirt that I've got.

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But yeah, I hear all kinds of
things like.

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That after this he was looking
for a house because he got his

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leg amputated and it was great.
It was a crazy year, leg

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amputated like in the spring.
My mom passed away in July, so

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it is a tough time for him.
He sold the house, but then he

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wasn't really looking for a
house.

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And we're like, you know, if you
don't get out, if you don't

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look, you don't find the other
people going to have a leg up on

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you in the competition, stuff
like that.

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I assume he liked it.
He laughed.

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So any other ones that have been
tossed down?

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I'm.
Sure there is, because nobody,

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nobody hesitates to, to drop one
of those.

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So yeah, I've heard, I've heard
plenty.

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I've also got a shirt that talks
about they said it'd be an arm

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and a leg, but I talked them
down and you know, things like

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that.
Yeah, We should put, you know,

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you know, So we do have some.
I'm not wearing it.

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I should have.
We do have some merch.

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Oh, you do?
Yeah, the Take 2.

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Take two merch yeah, we should
put one on there especially for

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you take one, take one.
Don't take two, just take one.

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I've got my foot caught in my
mic.

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All right, so with that, we'll
we will head into Part 2 where

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we're just hear some of your
reflections on it, maybe things

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God has taught you through this
so.

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So we're going to take it to the
next level.

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From the hearts of the Low
Country in South Carolina.

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It's the Take Two podcast where
we take theology to the next

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level.
All right, So traumatic injury,

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life changing injury in many
ways.

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That's right.
Physical, I'm assuming?

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My capacity is diminished for
work and for activity.

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You know, I didn't run much
before, to be honest.

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Age had taken care of that.
But but I don't even think about

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it now.
Were there ever times I'm

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assuming the answer is no, but
it's OK?

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The answer is yes, but I hear
some people talk about this and

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they talk about doubting God
throughout of it.

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But I mean, I'm assuming that
that were there ever doubts like

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that or it's hard to know unless
you go through it?

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For me, no.
I have some doubts about

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something, but it's not that I I
what happened The time that I

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sat there wondering if I would
die.

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When I woke up alive I was happy
and I still am because I didn't

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have to survive that.
I didn't know if I was going to

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and and better men than me have
died in accidents and he spared

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my life.
God did.

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There's several things, many
things could have gone

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differently and I wouldn't have
made it.

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Me not having a belt, my son not
being able to carry me down or

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not being able to get the ladder
undone, me passing out and and

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any number of other things.
So I've remained happy to be

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alive now.
I've had a lot of pain, I've had

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some emotional breakdowns, some
discouragement regarding my

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healing and how long it took,
and wondering if I'd ever be

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able to sleep or ever be able to
to not be taking pain meds.

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But what has remained is that
God let me live and I wanted to

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live.
So I'm happy about that and and

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I wouldn't take it back.
That's probably not completely

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true.
But what I mean to say by that

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is I don't regret what has
happened that.

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Was one of my questions because
Johnny Erickson Tata fairly well

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known but if you don't know had
this life altering accident she.

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A lot worse than what?
Happened, Yeah.

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Dove into a shallow pool, broke
her neck, was paralyzed, and

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then later in life had cancer.
She was fighting.

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And I two or three, four years
ago, someone was interviewing

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her and she said I wouldn't take
it back because God used it so

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many ways.
And so that was one of my

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questions.
Like, you know, have you gotten

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to the point where you 'cause
that's somewhat tough to say.

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It's something that that people
might not believe, but it's,

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it's the truth because I really
thought that I might die.

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I thought I was going to die.
And I'm I'm still happy to be

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alive.
And and, and So what something,

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some things that have happened
and is that I've realized that

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my life belongs to God because
it could have been ended a year

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ago.
And some people were like,

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didn't you always know your life
belonged to God?

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But I but it's like but it's an
experiential way that you can't

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explain.
Now everybody, and that's what I

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tell people, I said, and so does
yours and, and it's good to know

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it without this happening.
And I didn't know it, but now I

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really know because I didn't
have to be here.

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And So what it has taught me is
the meaning of Ecclesiastes 72,

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which says it's better to go to
a House of mourning than to a

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House of feasting, because that
is the end of every man and the

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wise or something like that.
Take it to heart and when you

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read that proverb type wisdom
statement, you're like, ah,

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that's Nah, you don't believe
that and and it is a proverb.

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It's not like you should be
happy at a funeral and not care

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about weddings.
It's but the truth of the matter

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is going to the House of
mourning, it shows you it's

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better for your soul long term
if you come to recognize that

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that box is where I'm going to
end up.

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And it is.
And it is for me and you and

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everyone else.
And for me personally, I know it

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in such a more clear way that I
could have been in that box for

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a year now and there would have
been nothing unusual about that

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happening.
It would have been sad, been sad

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for my children and all of that.
But that's what happens when you

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lose all that blood and you're
out in the middle of nowhere.

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But the wise recognizes that
they're going to end up in that

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box dead.
And that means you need to be

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ready for that.
And it doesn't just mean for

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unbelievers.
It's not just me talking to

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unbelievers and saying you
better get ready for death

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because it's coming.
It's, it's believers to ask

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yourself, since you believe that
God the Son took on flesh and

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came down to this earth and
endured betrayal and disrespect

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and torture and death for you,
Are you ready to look him in the

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eyes when you can see the scars
in his hands?

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And Are you ready for that
because you know what he did for

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you and what have you done with
your life?

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And it's important for believers
to know that that day is coming.

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And are you going to be ashamed
when you look at at Jesus?

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And so that's what it's taught
me.

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And and I hope to always know
that my remaining time truly

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belongs to him and I ought to do
whatever it is that he wants for

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me to do.
Now you ask about doubts.

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Before the accident, when my
church was without a pastor and

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I and a couple other guys was
filling in for almost a year,

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preaching developed a strong
desire to preach and possibly

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pastor the church.
But you know, I'm a farmer and I

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have some deficiencies.
I have some deficiencies in

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dealing with people and and
leadership things.

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I just didn't know if I was, if
that was right thing for me.

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So I ended up deciding, well, I
preach a little bit.

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I'm going to keep doing that.
I'm going to do, you know what

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I've been doing.
And I had pretty well settled on

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that.
And then the Lord, well, I don't

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want to say the Lord took my
leg.

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Then this happened to me.
Well, for all of us who are

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pretty high on His sovereignty,
we're fine with that.

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Well.
He allowed it to be taken.

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Well, there we go.
And now it everything's wide

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open.
Can I even farm if I want to?

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And I am working now.
I've gotten a lot better, but I

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certainly will never be able to
do all the things that I did

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before.
And the desire came back.

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So I got to thinking that God
was going to show me with, with

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absolutely no question that
that's what I was supposed to

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do.
And it hasn't been that clear.

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And and I'll think something and
well, nothing happens.

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And and so I, well, what is he
doing?

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Did he ever say?
Did he was he speaking to me or

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not?
You know, what am I supposed to

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do with my life?
I say that I'm ready to do what

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he wants, but what's he want me
to do?

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You know, so I really have some
ups and downs.

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Wait on him, perhaps?
Perhaps.

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Yeah, that's, those are the
tough ones.

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I I'll just say, you know, I
know you had sin in your life

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'cause I 'cause you're a Sinner
and I have sin in my life.

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And I think if I went like, you
know, through this, you know,

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whatever level of sin we have in
our life, it's too much, right?

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But you know, I know, I know you
and I've known you.

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So I know that you have been on
a the path of sanctification

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since we were young and
hopefully I've been on that same

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path.
Would you say that this accident

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has sharpened that or how do you
do you think about that kind of

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stuff or?
I think that it has made me

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except that I belong to him and
that I ought to do whatever it

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is that he wants me to do.
Now, it hasn't taken away the

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the specific struggles that I
have had over the years.

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And I still, I still fight those
things that the different

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temptations that are common to
me may be common to others.

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But but you know, we all have
things that we struggle with and

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it it hasn't taken that away.
But I just don't have any doubt

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that that I ought to be living
for him and and I hope that I'm

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ready to do so.
Anything that you know, any

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other questions or struggles you
had during the time or

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opportunities that have come
from this that you want to talk

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about?
I certainly have some

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opportunities in that stand out
and people are interested.

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And so when I talk about the
Lord or I talk about what has

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happened to me and, and people,
people will listen, you know,

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and since since then, and these
are not necessarily new.

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Well, I guess they are.
I've been I've given myself more

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to to being available to preach
or speak to people for.

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I've started preaching at a
nursing home every 3rd Sunday in

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the afternoon and I've so it's.
Not third Sunday singing.

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No.
Well, it is actually.

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I sing too.
In fact, they like the singing a

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whole lot more than they like
the preaching.

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And I don't mean my singing, I
just mean that's they love.

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So these are old folks.
In fact, I've lost three in the

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past six weeks or so, and a
couple of my favorite ones.

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Those people are stuck there,
there.

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I've heard a, I've heard my
dad's preacher say because he

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also visits this place
regularly, that these are folks

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under a death sentence.
They are at the end of their

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life and they know it and they
want to sing about heaven and

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they want to gather and, and
sing and hear.

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They want to hear the word.
They like singing the best, but

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they want to hear the word.
And I never do that.

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I, I might feel tired or not
looking forward to it when I go,

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but every time you feel like
this was a good thing to do.

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This is a service to these
people that they, they want to

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have church and they can't
because they're stuck here.

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So if we can provide that for
them and.

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This is just a nursing home.
Yeah.

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So it's only the the residents
who want to attend.

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It's only the ones that want to
come.

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That's right.
And now we do a little bit of

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visiting, but I've been limited
in that one time I went to visit

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and I walked around for an hour
and I was down for a week since

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I wasn't down where I couldn't
walk.

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But I was really struggling for
a week after that.

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So I've been limited in the
visiting.

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I could do other than the
preaching, but they like that

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too, that when you come up
there, they might not even know

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who you are.
They just want somebody to talk

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to.
So, So that's something that I

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love being able to do.
I've I've been preaching

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occasionally at a substance
abuse rehab nearby and I've

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started to and now I'm going to
be doing that once a week.

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I filled in at several churches.
What has happened is I've told

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my church that I have this
desire, possibly even to, to not

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just to preach what I've been
doing, but possibly even to

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pastor a church.
And, and of course they're,

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they've all been very supportive
of that.

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And, and I've got my name out
there.

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And so I filled in in a few
places and, and things like

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that.
So what I'm doing is I'm trying

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to find out if that's what if
I'm called to do that.

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I, I feel I, I have the desire
and I think that means

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something.
I may or may not have the gift.

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You know, it depends on who you
ask, I'm sure.

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But I, what I feel like or what
I'm doing is waiting to see if

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they're people of God confirm
that calling on me or not.

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And they may not, they, they
really may not.

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But what I do feel like is what
I feel certain about is that

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I'm, I'm called to preach the
gospel.

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And that doesn't mean you're
called to be a pastor of a

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church.
So I'm going to do that when I

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have the opportunity.
And that's what I'm doing.

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And if it extends beyond that,
then I'm willing to do it.

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There's a guy I listen to that
gets mentioned on this podcast

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every now and then called Greg
Koppel has his own podcast, but

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he has this phrase.
He talks about being blooming

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where you're planted.
And it sounds like that's what

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you're aiming to do to to take
what your opportunities that you

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have and make the most of them.
And then it's on God really to

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provide other opportunities as
he sees fit.

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I'm trying to start a community
Bible study in my town, which I

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did for about a year before my
accident.

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And I just actually just this
past week had my first meeting

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again and I'm just looking to
see what happens.

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And I don't know if anything
happens.

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I had a few come and I'm just
willing.

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I'm willing to do what what he
shows me to do.

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But it's pretty the the doubts
and the questioning is when you.

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Don't know.
It's he won't just write it down

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and send it to you in in the
paper.

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And that's and I'm a I'm a timid
person.

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I'm, I'll tell you something
else I've learned, because in

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order to do a community Bible
study, that means you have to go

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out there and ask people to come
to it in person or you should.

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Obviously Facebook is something,
but it ain't much.

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You need to look somebody in the
eye and, and make them think

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you, you want to minister to
them.

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And that's hard for me because
I'm a I'm something of a coward,

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honestly.
I've never been a real people

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person and, and I've been afraid
to go up to people and talk to

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them and stuff like that.
I'm the kind that can eat in a

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restaurant by myself or
whatever, you know, you know,

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But here's the verse I'll tell
you about.

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I don't know if you've ever
thought about in Revelation, at

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the end, it talks about who's
fixing to get thrown in the lake

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of fire.
And it says, and the cowardly

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and the unbelieving, and this
and that, and all ours, you

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know.
Even from years ago, that's

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still the cowardly, you know, I
don't understand that, but I

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think I've come to understand it
a little and it really is a is a

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conviction to me, if you
believe.

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That the verses before that say
something about to those who

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overcome this, but to the
cowardly.

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So I take it to be the people
who refuse to overcome.

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So you know, and so you have
both spiritual and physical

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things that you are seeking to
overcome.

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00:20:48,160 --> 00:20:54,200
That's right.
And, and one of them is timidity

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in a crowd or among people, or
to go and talk to someone about

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something important, especially
and, and, and The thing is, so

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I've wondered what is it about
cowardice that would offend God

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so much?
And for the believer, you say

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that the sovereign of the
universe who created all things

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00:21:25,240 --> 00:21:27,880
is, will never leave you or
forsake you.

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And has him dwelt you with his
Holy Spirit to do the work of

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00:21:32,040 --> 00:21:33,480
ministry?
You know, and that's for

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00:21:33,480 --> 00:21:36,480
everyone.
And when I said earlier, I

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called to preach the gospel,
There's a real sense in which

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00:21:39,960 --> 00:21:43,520
every believer is is called.
Obviously there's different ways

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00:21:43,520 --> 00:21:49,760
people do it.
But if you, if you, if you've

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got that God empowering you,
it's offensive to say you're

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00:21:55,920 --> 00:21:59,520
afraid to talk to somebody or
afraid to do what you think

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00:21:59,520 --> 00:22:04,560
he's, you've got no business
being afraid to do what he is

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00:22:04,600 --> 00:22:09,280
asking or directing you to do.
And so I'm trying to overcome

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that a little and and I'm
working on it.

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How has this accident, Has it
had ripple effects into your and

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00:22:17,440 --> 00:22:21,040
Christie's relationship or
Christie's outlook by my for

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00:22:21,040 --> 00:22:23,920
your kids?
I'm assuming that it's touched

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00:22:24,480 --> 00:22:26,200
your whole nuclear family in
some way.

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Something else that I've said a
couple of times lately, it's and

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this is another reason why I
don't regret what has happened.

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It's it's better to grow closer
to your spouse on one leg than

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00:22:44,760 --> 00:22:51,960
to drift apart on 2.
And and we have had struggles

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00:22:52,080 --> 00:22:55,720
that I don't, I'm not interested
in talking about necessarily,

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00:22:55,720 --> 00:23:02,880
but we're stronger now.
The same goes with your

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00:23:02,880 --> 00:23:07,240
children.
There's three things that are

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00:23:07,240 --> 00:23:12,400
better on one leg than the
opposite onto and it's to grow

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00:23:12,400 --> 00:23:15,880
close to your spouse rather than
drift away, to grow close and

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00:23:15,880 --> 00:23:22,080
strong bonded with your children
rather than to be at odds and to

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00:23:22,160 --> 00:23:31,200
know that your life belongs to
God and that you ought to do you

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00:23:31,200 --> 00:23:39,200
ought to live for him than to be
what so many of us are is just

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00:23:39,840 --> 00:23:41,600
living for ourselves
essentially.

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I mean, we go to church and we
might even do this or that

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00:23:44,280 --> 00:23:51,240
thing, but so many of us are are
working for money and we're

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00:23:51,840 --> 00:23:56,280
doing the things we want to do.
We're we don't have God as the

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00:23:56,280 --> 00:23:59,240
first priority in our lives.
And it's so it's.

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00:23:59,240 --> 00:24:02,560
You went and said that people
shouldn't work for money, but it

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00:24:02,560 --> 00:24:06,640
shouldn't be what they wrap
their whole lives around.

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00:24:06,640 --> 00:24:08,920
That's right, that's right.
That's what I mean.

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And and there was something
well, he gave himself for us.

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00:24:17,320 --> 00:24:23,600
He actually, he calls us to to
give ourselves to him, to take

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00:24:23,600 --> 00:24:28,600
up our cross and follow him.
And he tells us not to seek

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00:24:28,600 --> 00:24:34,240
first the things that everyone
else is seeking the the but that

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00:24:34,280 --> 00:24:36,120
to seek first the Kingdom of
God.

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00:24:36,280 --> 00:24:41,400
And it's good to know that, even
if you have to learn it on one

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00:24:41,400 --> 00:24:45,560
leg.
So that's what I've learned, I

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00:24:45,560 --> 00:24:47,840
think.
Anything else?

345
00:24:48,240 --> 00:24:51,880
Any anything else you want to
share?

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00:24:51,880 --> 00:24:56,000
Any like I know we talked about
preaching, but any future plans?

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00:24:57,000 --> 00:25:03,920
Well, no, I don't have, I've,
I've, I've put my name out to a

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00:25:03,920 --> 00:25:06,360
couple of churches that are
looking and things like that.

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00:25:06,360 --> 00:25:10,280
But, but I have no experience.
I'm a 50 year old farmer.

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That's you know, I, we, I was on
a pulpit committee and I wasn't

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00:25:15,320 --> 00:25:20,600
interested in some guy like
that, you know, so I, So what I

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00:25:20,600 --> 00:25:26,200
tell those churches is just I'm
still, I'm looking for what I'm

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00:25:26,200 --> 00:25:28,440
supposed to do.
I know that I'm willing to do it

354
00:25:28,440 --> 00:25:32,160
and I know that I have a desire
to do it, but I'm waiting on God

355
00:25:32,360 --> 00:25:35,760
through his people to confirm
whether or not that's what he

356
00:25:35,760 --> 00:25:38,840
wants from me or not.
And he may not because I do

357
00:25:38,840 --> 00:25:41,880
have, I have some deficiencies I
could list for you.

358
00:25:42,920 --> 00:25:46,640
Maybe that's not what I'm
supposed to do, but I know he

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00:25:46,640 --> 00:25:52,280
wants me to witness for him and
I know that I'm able to speak,

360
00:25:52,920 --> 00:25:56,640
you know, to, to speak or teach
a class or whatever.

361
00:25:56,640 --> 00:26:01,800
So I'm I'm going to do what?
Whatever he opens up for me to

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00:26:01,800 --> 00:26:05,000
do.
I guess all right.

363
00:26:05,200 --> 00:26:10,200
Any other closing thoughts?
I can't remember what I'm

364
00:26:10,200 --> 00:26:12,680
supposed to say.
That's the second time.

365
00:26:12,840 --> 00:26:14,680
Ever.
No, I wasn't necessarily trying

366
00:26:14,680 --> 00:26:16,920
to close.
I just wanted to, you know, you

367
00:26:16,920 --> 00:26:20,720
know, anything else that you had
had to say in general.

368
00:26:20,920 --> 00:26:25,840
Oh well, I don't think so.
No questions.

369
00:26:26,360 --> 00:26:30,360
No more questions.
All right, that's our take.

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00:26:30,560 --> 00:26:31,360
There we go.
All right.

371
00:26:31,360 --> 00:26:34,440
Thank you, Brian.
Thanks for listening to Take

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00:26:34,440 --> 00:26:36,680
Two.
Find us wherever you find

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00:26:36,680 --> 00:26:39,200
podcasts and on YouTube for
those who want to watch our

374
00:26:39,200 --> 00:26:39,840
video cast.